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How To Buy A Vacuum Sealer: A Guide

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geneabovill

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Step one: say to SWMBO (the Minister for War and Finance) "Honey, you know how we waste a lot of food?" Note: this will work even if you don't waste food.
SWMBO: "Yes, we do, don't we?"
Note: See?
Gene: "Well, there's a machine that seals food in an airtight bag and extends the shelf-life by years!"
SWMBO: "I've seen them on Kardashians/Today Tonight/Jersey Shore. They look handy."
Gene: "Yeah, I thought we could get one and buy meat in bulk."
SWMBO: "Gene, I know you buy those green pellets in kilo bags and split them up. Just buy a frigging vacuum sealer."
Gene: gets on eBay before the sentence is finished and has spent $100 on the machine and extra bags, and a further $50 on hops.
Winning!
 

jammer

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Step one: say to SWMBO (the Minister for War and Finance) "Honey, you know how we waste a lot of food?" Note: this will work even if you don't waste food.
SWMBO: "Yes, we do, don't we?"
Note: See?
Gene: "Well, there's a machine that seals food in an airtight bag and extends the shelf-life by years!"
SWMBO: "I've seen them on Kardashians/Today Tonight/Jersey Shore. They look handy."
Gene: "Yeah, I thought we could get one and buy meat in bulk."
SWMBO: "Gene, I know you buy those green pellets in kilo bags and split them up. Just buy a frigging vacuum sealer."
Gene: gets on eBay before the sentence is finished and has spent $100 on the machine and extra bags, and a further $50 on hops.
Winning!
Wow. Had just read a post on another thread about vac sealers.... Was just heading to eBay, and saw this... Spooky. It must be a sign.
Let us shop.
 

Pistol

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Funny shite!

My other half just says, "what have you bought now?!"
 

Westaussiebrewer

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Hahaha gold

Just tried this on SWMBO and was told to shut up Xmas is coming

:) guess I know what's coming my way

Haha
 

Nick JD

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SWMBO: You know how you always roll off me and fall straight asleep?
YOU: Yes. You're too sexy for me to hold on longer, sweetie.
SWMBO: Well, I've seen a thing online that will satisfy me.
YOU: I think you should buy it. Then we'll both be satisfied.
SWMBO: Great. I clicked on Buy It Now.

http://www.BigNigerianPenisForYourWife.com
 

Maheel

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SWMBO: You know how you always roll off me and fall straight asleep?
YOU: Yes. You're too sexy for me to hold on longer, sweetie.
SWMBO: Well, I've seen a thing online that will satisfy me.
YOU: I think you should buy it. Then we'll both be satisfied.
SWMBO: Great. I clicked on Buy It Now.

http://www.BigNigerianPenisForYourWife.com
lol at my results from clicking the link
http://optu.search-help.net/index.php?orig...271%26st%3D0%26

i was a bit scared to clik your link Nick
 

Rod

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I got mine from aldi about 5 years ago

still going strong

have to wait till they come on special
 

QldKev

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How to buy a vac sealer

Kev: hey honey, I just used some money from your budget to buy myself more brewing shit
Wife: that's ok honey, hope you enjoy it
:wub:
 

geneabovill

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Wouldn't go with the Nigerian one - too many scammers. Perhaps you could take a mold of your massive wang and send it over? Be careful, though, you lose about 4% of the size when taking a mold. :)
 

mosto

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I got mine from aldi about 5 years ago

still going strong

have to wait till they come on special
Tha vac sealer or the Nigerian appendage???
 

geneabovill

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The Nigerian appendage will be on special on Saturday!
 

Truman42

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How to buy a vac sealer

Kev: hey honey, I just used some money from your budget to buy myself more brewing shit
Wife: that's ok honey, hope you enjoy it
:wub:

Mines more like this..

Truman: Hey honey we should buy one of those vac sealers so we can seal up left overs and stuff then I can take them to work and save money by not buying lunch.

Wife: Thats a good idea lets get one.

Truman: Hey guess what I can seal my hops with his thing too, I never thought of that.

Wife: Bullshit, I knew there was an ulterior motive to do with brewing in this.

Unfortunately she can see right through me. :D
 

komodo

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Mines more like this :

Me : buys vacuum sealer on line
Vac sealer turns up
Her : "Whats that?"
Me "Vac sealer for my hops"
Her : "Oh ok"

Man up bitches.
 

bignath

"Grains don't grow up to be chips, son"
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Wouldn't go with the Nigerian one - too many scammers. Perhaps you could take a mold of your massive wang and send it over? Be careful, though, you lose about 4% of the size when taking a mold. :)
That's called shrinkage, or losses to cooling..., and yep, most software calculates this as 4%.
 

bignath

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Mines more like this :

Me : buys vacuum sealer on line
Vac sealer turns up
Her : "Whats that?"
Me "Vac sealer for my hops"
Her : "Oh ok"

Man up bitches.
:lol: :lol:
 

DU99

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we where buying in bulk meat and suggested we get one ,then came the hops
 

Verbyla

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From a single mans point of view

You: I really want a vac sealer
You: I really really want a vac sealer
You: Hmmmm is cost an issue? Should I hold back until I've saved enough in the beer fund? Do I really need one? :unsure:
You: Click "Buy Now"..... BOOM Vac Sealer
 

Helles

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From a single mans point of view

You: I really want a vac sealer
You: I really really want a vac sealer
You: Hmmmm is cost an issue? Should I hold back until I've saved enough in the beer fund? Do I really need one? :unsure:
You: Click "Buy Now"..... BOOM Vac Sealer

I just buy things and question them later
 

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