How To Buy A Vacuum Sealer: A Guide

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geneabovill

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Step one: say to SWMBO (the Minister for War and Finance) "Honey, you know how we waste a lot of food?" Note: this will work even if you don't waste food.
SWMBO: "Yes, we do, don't we?"
Note: See?
Gene: "Well, there's a machine that seals food in an airtight bag and extends the shelf-life by years!"
SWMBO: "I've seen them on Kardashians/Today Tonight/Jersey Shore. They look handy."
Gene: "Yeah, I thought we could get one and buy meat in bulk."
SWMBO: "Gene, I know you buy those green pellets in kilo bags and split them up. Just buy a frigging vacuum sealer."
Gene: gets on eBay before the sentence is finished and has spent $100 on the machine and extra bags, and a further $50 on hops.
Winning!
 
Step one: say to SWMBO (the Minister for War and Finance) "Honey, you know how we waste a lot of food?" Note: this will work even if you don't waste food.
SWMBO: "Yes, we do, don't we?"
Note: See?
Gene: "Well, there's a machine that seals food in an airtight bag and extends the shelf-life by years!"
SWMBO: "I've seen them on Kardashians/Today Tonight/Jersey Shore. They look handy."
Gene: "Yeah, I thought we could get one and buy meat in bulk."
SWMBO: "Gene, I know you buy those green pellets in kilo bags and split them up. Just buy a frigging vacuum sealer."
Gene: gets on eBay before the sentence is finished and has spent $100 on the machine and extra bags, and a further $50 on hops.
Winning!
Wow. Had just read a post on another thread about vac sealers.... Was just heading to eBay, and saw this... Spooky. It must be a sign.
Let us shop.
 
Funny shite!

My other half just says, "what have you bought now?!"
 
Hahaha gold

Just tried this on SWMBO and was told to shut up Xmas is coming

:) guess I know what's coming my way

Haha
 
SWMBO: You know how you always roll off me and fall straight asleep?
YOU: Yes. You're too sexy for me to hold on longer, sweetie.
SWMBO: Well, I've seen a thing online that will satisfy me.
YOU: I think you should buy it. Then we'll both be satisfied.
SWMBO: Great. I clicked on Buy It Now.

http://www.BigNigerianPenisForYourWife.com
 
SWMBO: You know how you always roll off me and fall straight asleep?
YOU: Yes. You're too sexy for me to hold on longer, sweetie.
SWMBO: Well, I've seen a thing online that will satisfy me.
YOU: I think you should buy it. Then we'll both be satisfied.
SWMBO: Great. I clicked on Buy It Now.

http://www.BigNigerianPenisForYourWife.com

lol at my results from clicking the link
http://optu.search-help.net/index.php?orig...271%26st%3D0%26

i was a bit scared to clik your link Nick
 
I got mine from aldi about 5 years ago

still going strong

have to wait till they come on special
 
How to buy a vac sealer

Kev: hey honey, I just used some money from your budget to buy myself more brewing shit
Wife: that's ok honey, hope you enjoy it
:wub:
 
Wouldn't go with the Nigerian one - too many scammers. Perhaps you could take a mold of your massive wang and send it over? Be careful, though, you lose about 4% of the size when taking a mold. :)
 
How to buy a vac sealer

Kev: hey honey, I just used some money from your budget to buy myself more brewing shit
Wife: that's ok honey, hope you enjoy it
:wub:


Mines more like this..

Truman: Hey honey we should buy one of those vac sealers so we can seal up left overs and stuff then I can take them to work and save money by not buying lunch.

Wife: Thats a good idea lets get one.

Truman: Hey guess what I can seal my hops with his thing too, I never thought of that.

Wife: Bullshit, I knew there was an ulterior motive to do with brewing in this.

Unfortunately she can see right through me. :D
 
Mines more like this :

Me : buys vacuum sealer on line
Vac sealer turns up
Her : "Whats that?"
Me "Vac sealer for my hops"
Her : "Oh ok"

Man up bitches.
 
Wouldn't go with the Nigerian one - too many scammers. Perhaps you could take a mold of your massive wang and send it over? Be careful, though, you lose about 4% of the size when taking a mold. :)

That's called shrinkage, or losses to cooling..., and yep, most software calculates this as 4%.
 
Mines more like this :

Me : buys vacuum sealer on line
Vac sealer turns up
Her : "Whats that?"
Me "Vac sealer for my hops"
Her : "Oh ok"

Man up bitches.

:lol: :lol:
 
From a single mans point of view

You: I really want a vac sealer
You: I really really want a vac sealer
You: Hmmmm is cost an issue? Should I hold back until I've saved enough in the beer fund? Do I really need one? :unsure:
You: Click "Buy Now"..... BOOM Vac Sealer
 
From a single mans point of view

You: I really want a vac sealer
You: I really really want a vac sealer
You: Hmmmm is cost an issue? Should I hold back until I've saved enough in the beer fund? Do I really need one? :unsure:
You: Click "Buy Now"..... BOOM Vac Sealer


I just buy things and question them later
 

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