Dear mate,
Thank you for taking the time to write, I'm pleased you can did. I'm proud to announce we're constantly in a fantastic position to offer you whatever the shit we want, unless it doesn't make as much as our shareholders dictate. For instance, it would be far too costly, let alone unAustralian, to start pandering to all the wogs and boat people that seem to be bothering our 1950's white Methodist demographic these days, you should be ******* grateful you can buy a hot chicken lovingly nurtured in our intensive farm - and I'll tell you how good they are mate, Woolies sell the same shit... Anyway, funny you mention home brew, I strongly believe at base level, it just comes down to regenerated incremental processing and taking into account our exploratory research points to ambient asset flexibility and factoring in a more contemporary reimagining of our integrated modular contingencies... get to **** piss boy. We have a store in Footscray, perhaps you could move there, our investigations suggest we might even start selling crack there...
Local regards,
Y'ou Rstuffed.
We Own Australia SuperMarkets (cause you don't know any different...).
Wesmarkets Inc (oh and maybe we've got a financial interest in all those odd little Malls in the suburbs that have a Realty, a Bottle shop (affiliated), a Loot (or at least a weird hippy shop), a discount shop that sells usefully sized plastic containers, a veggie shop (odd affiliation to the local super market...), a news agent (that looks like all the other news agents), a hair architect and maybe a couple of Chinese cafe's that sell weird coloured sausages and Yum Cha - whatever that is - and day old chips, oh and bless our OP shops,
...meh, second half of the Engerland game, suspend rant...