Supposing I Found a Keg?

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Fat Bastard

Brew Cvlt Doom
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Now just for a minute, imagine that I found a keg abandoned by the roadside. Not in a council clean up, just sitting near a tree all on it's lonesome. Now also suppose that I felt sorry for it, and when I pulled over, it leapt into the boot of my car.

You'd have to imagine that the keg is emblazoned with it's owner's name, and now has some battle scars from when it hurled itself in a fit of despair from the back of the truck that was thundering around the bend near the tree I found it under.

Now would you suppose that I should make an attempt to return it to it's rightful owner, or should piety yield to Satan's Prong and let idle hands turn to the devils work of "re-purposing" it?

Hypothetically, of course.

Anonymous

(Name and Address Withheld)
 
Every beer you make in it will taste like shame.
 
It's got one of Jesus' angels on it, and I found it within sight of a church. Perhaps it is a gift from God?
 
I think that any keg, suffering for so long under the oppressive heel of a dictatorship that is a commercial brewery (not to mention being irrevocably marked with the name of it's oppressor) would gladly welcome the opportunity for a second chance at life as "re-purposed".

Fear-not Anonymous (Name & address withheld), I believe that your proposal is a noble one & should be lauded (albeit quietly ;) ) by all who believe in the deserved freedom of shackled & oppressed kegs the world-over.
 
Look the way I see it and please take note of the 'I' is basically if its any of the major breweries and your lucky enough to have one of their kegs fall into your hands....empty or not empty, don't feel terrible claiming it as your own, they will survive the loss of a few kegs, if anything think of yourself as Robin Hood, just giving back............to yourself
 
It's only illegal if you get caught...

I would tell your friend's friend's uncle's dad's friend to keep it, after all they are only doing said company a favor by removing their rubbish from the dumped spot to prevent them from being fined.
 
Fat ******* said:
It's got one of Jesus' angels on it, and I found it within sight of a church. Perhaps it is a gift from God?
Perhaps its a test?
Historically, god tends to be particularly capricious and vengeful.

When thine first batch renders thee blind and covered in boils, tho shalt know from whence it came.
 
We sent 9 kegs to Melb GBW 2 years ago & didn't get a single keg back - The loss was a huge hit for a little brewery like ours & if it wasn't for the bar in question finally settling a year later (we were very fortunate) it's unlikely we would have done another interstate beer event. The kegs are owned by someone, big or small, it's no excuse to steal...
P.S. The 9 kegs are still lost somewhere & are all embossed with the Bacchus name - Reward for their safe return if you spot them anywhere :)


Cheers Ross
 
Enjoy your new "hypothetical" find!!
Great to have a "hypothetical" win every now and again!!
 
Fat ******* said:
It's got one of Jesus' angels on it, and I found it within sight of a church. Perhaps it is a gift from God?
Are you sure you aren't confusing Bacchus (Roman god of wine and intoxication) with Christian Angels?
 
I agree with Ross. Try and give it back.Let them know your interest and they may have an old keg or two they can give you or indeed give you that one. You would be doing the right thing.
 
djar007 said:
Try and give it back. Let them know your interest and they may have an old keg or two they can give you or indeed give you that one.
They might not, too.
 

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