I'm a FU@3ING *****!

[zeddy1234]

Hilarious thread makes me feel not do bad about all my stuff ups.

I've had the bottling wand fall apart mid bottle only realised when it wouldn't stop filling! Minimal beer loss so all good!

 

[rheffera]

I left the tap open on the fermenter when transferring from the cube, wort all over the kitchen floor, took a while to realise... FAAAAAARK

explain that one to the misses.....

dONE THIS MYSELF..

 

[jkhlt1210]

Cheers to everyone for your stories! I'm the OP and it's nice to know I'm not alone!! This has turned into a great thread to read !

 

[jaypes]

I had a 40L pot on the boil, with the wort almost to the top.

Threw in a handful of hops at the first addition

Then we had a Mt Etna event

Needless to say I was wearing thongs (the foot type)

 

[ManVsBeer]

dONE THIS MYSELF..

Me too more than a few times. I have come to the conclusion that the more I fuss about it not happening "this time", the more likely it will occur. I think the tradition of having a brew whilst brewing is a significant factor with this issue.

 

[Tahoose]

Chucked in my strike water only to realise about 1 min later when I started adding grains that is left the plug open..

Had a slight overflow from the lauter bucket last night.. Only lost 500ml so not too bad ..

 

[Yob]

Quote a while ago, I added PBW to the mash thinking it was 5.2.. Realised when I went to put the tub back in the brew cupboard and there was the 5.2 sitting there.. Binned the whole mash and started again.. And labeled my tubs..

I use acidulated malt mow..

 

[wereprawn]

I must enter a post apparently.

 

[RobboMC]

"I've had the bottling wand fall apart mid bottle only realised when it wouldn't stop filling! Minimal beer loss so all good!"


The standard bottling wands are crap. I have had 3 just fall apart on me over the years.

Anyone found anything better that lasts more than 4-5 brews. Now I super glue them together
but I'm not real happy with that either.

 

[jkhlt1210]

"I've had the bottling wand fall apart mid bottle only realised when it wouldn't stop filling! Minimal beer loss so all good!"


The standard bottling wands are crap. I have had 3 just fall apart on me over the years.

Anyone found anything better that lasts more than 4-5 brews. Now I super glue them together
but I'm not real happy with that either.

Yeah bud I've had that too! The blue ones with spring are worse!!! I just keep pushing it together after every few bottles. Not sure what else to do with them

 

[Blind Dog]

[SIZE=medium]Too many to mention them all, but some highlights:[/SIZE]
[SIZE=medium]- forgot to put the bottom mesh in the malt pipe BEFORE putting the grain in!![/SIZE]
[SIZE=medium]- got water to strike temp, remembered to put the mesh in this time, but filled the malt pipe and looked around for the nut to hold everything in place and realised it was inside the BM…[/SIZE]

[SIZE=medium]but the bset by a mile was when the silicone hose slipped off the tap when transferring 90C wort to the cube (forgot to tighten the hose clip properly) and I decided to try to push it back on rather than just turn off the tap. I did fill the cube first, but am somewhat ashamed to admit I did not clean down before heading to hospital. Apparently liquid at 90C causes pretty nasty burns damn quickly[/SIZE]

 

[Blind Dog]

Oh, and making an ESB and realising i'd used Chinook for bittering not Fuggles. Interesting beer, but not altogether in a good way

 

[mosto]

Well, just had my biggest f#%k up. Setting up for my Sat night brew night. Ran hose to my BIAB pot to start filling it with water, but for some unknown reason, I decided to switch the element on before I went and turned pump on to run the water. Turns out the element was running just long enough without being submersed in water to blow the f#%king thing and short the house. Cranky Mrs and brew night cancelled.

I reset the fuse box to get power back to the house, go to chuck hops back in keg fridge freezer and noticed the gas bottle is now empty. F%%king top night!

 

[Blind Dog]

Well, just had my biggest f#%k up. Setting up for my Sat night brew night. Ran hose to my BIAB pot to start filling it with water, but for some unknown reason, I decided to switch the element on before I went and turned pump on to run the water. Turns out the element was running just long enough without being submersed in water to blow the f#%king thing and short the house. Cranky Mrs and brew night cancelled.
I reset the fuse box to get power back to the house, go to chuck hops back in keg fridge freezer and noticed the gas bottle is now empty. F%%king top night!

B*****ks.

If your kegs were gassed up though, you should still be able to eke out a few pints...

 

[antiphile]

I was putting down a K&K hefeweizen, taken the OG, sealed the lid and placed the old-style FV in the water bath. Then I realised I hadn't pitched the yeast. I tried to open the lid, but with wet hands I had done too good a job tightening it. Lifted the FV out and placed it on the table. Wet slippery hands still prevented me. So, in a light bulb moment that would make Abbott and Costello proud (you choose whether that should be the political or comedian duo), I anchored the tap against my thigh, and used both hands to rotate the lid. It seems when the lid is really tight, the tap assembly has less resistance than the top. By the time the slow-ticking brain sprang into action I had all the wort accounted for, about 20 litres in the FV and about 3 in the carpet. D'oh!

 

[HBHB]

At that is why you never brew too sober, never brew too drunk.

 

[Droopy Brew]

In my youthful and ignorant brewing days I once tried to brew a Corona clone...

 

[Screamadelica]

Quote a while ago, I added PBW to the mash thinking it was 5.2.. Realised when I went to put the tub back in the brew cupboard and there was the 5.2 sitting there.. Binned the whole mash and started again.. And labeled my tubs..

I use acidulated malt mow..

You have no idea how many times I've put the tablespoon in and 5 Minutes later had a freakout and double checked what was on the label of the white container...