Brewsa Invitational 2006

[PistolPatch]

Once a year, The Washington Post's Mensa Invitational asks readers to take any word from the dictionary, alter it by adding, subtracting, or changing of one letter, and then supplying a new definition. (See Post titled Mensa 2005 Invitational Results for an example.)

A few of us have been doing the same with brewing words in this thread. I'll update this first post on occassion so as a fairly up to date list can always be found right here.

Have no idea how many words we can come up with. Never thought we'd even get to 50! Hope you can add a few! (Don't worry about breaking the one letter rule - we have!)

The latest list of 56 words and the contributors was updated on Sunday 12th February and is as follows...

Actobacter: Acrobatics performed by lips, nose and mouth after tasting an acetobacter infection. PP

Air lock: What your nose does when it smells the after effects of an infection. ST

Alpha Acrid Unit: Measure(%) of how nasty a bad beer is. (See sH) SW

Armylase: A militant enzyme group that kills enemy starch forces to create ally sugar forces, consisting primarily of alpha and beta armylase. (See dieastatic) SW

Attenulation: The attention applied too late to a kettle approaching the boil. PP

Barge Arm: A piece of grain brewing equipment that no matter what speed it runs water in, it forces the grain bed to compact. LZ

Blitch: Cleaning and sterilizing liquid found in various places. For example, blitch is often discovered in a hyphon that you thought was full of boiled water. A solution of blitch is also what you will find all your stainless steel soaking in 48 hours after a Fall Grain Brewing session. Liquid blitch often attacks the brewer's eyes whilst the aroma attacks the nostrils. PP

Blocculation: The process of covering the fermenters tap with yeast cake. SW

Brix: The dude with the first name Hans looking for bombs in your brewhouse. ST

Condamination: Blame given by the brewer to evrything and everyone but themselves when they produce a fale or a flager. PP

Corny Syrup: What comes out of your mouth when sitting next to an attractive person after way too many beers. PP

Daught: Describes a person that thinks Draught comes from a can, and the brewery that thinks it belongs in it. SW

Decocktion: A particularly nasty brewhouse accident, please be carefull. SW

Diestatic: Militant enzymes responsible for killing/immobilizing enemy starches. SW

Drunkel: Word to describe a person thats had too many Munich darks. SW

Fale: Usually brewed at the beginning of one's homebrew career. You think the beers is great but your mates have one sip, leave you at home, and go to the pub. (Uses top fermenting yeast). PP

Fall Grain Brewing: A method of brewing beer that takes so long, if you start drinking at the beginning you will fall down drunk well before the end of the process. PP

Fester: Volatile compound formed during fermentation that gives a beer a rotten, pungent or fetid yeast aroma. SW

Flager: Same as Fale yet brewed using a bottom fermenting yeast. Often brewed at the same temperature as a Fale - 32 degrees (celcius!). PP

Flowmenter: The name briefly given to a fermenter at the time of the addition of wort whilst the tap is still open. (See Lamenter) PP

Harshbrucker: Another type of aged German hop. (see Hellertau) WG

Head Retension: The screwing up of the eyes whilst trying to remember what you're meant to be doing next whilst Fall Grain Brewing. PP

Heat Slink: The silent creeping walk adopted by a married brewer away from the stove after a boil-over. PP

Hellertau: 18 month old hops, suitable only for lambic. WG

Hopnoid-ala: Paranoid over hop failure. BD

Hydropmeter: Instrument used to measure effect of Height on Smashiness. Note: Single use only. SW

Hyphon: A siphon so long you have to hyperventilate to get it going. PP

Ilcohol: The substance that gives you a hangover. SW

Infusion: The internal meltdown of a brewer when he realises he's mashed at the wrong temperature. SW

Intoxification: Inebriation experienced once a year by tourists in Italy during the running of the bulls. PP

Iodidne: The steriliser you thought you added to water but 2 weeks later realise you actually didnt. PP

Kisinglass: What a brewer does to a glass of crystal clear beer. SW

Kit & Keelover: Brewing method used by 18 year olds in their first foray into homebrewing. Comprises a kit of No Brand Malt and 6 to 7 kilos of sugar. PP

Klettle: The noise your hydropmeter makes on a ceramic tiled floor. ST

Krausing: What you do when you use your hydropmeter. ST

Lamenter: The name given to a fermenter into which you have just started to siphon wort, the telephone rings and the fermenter tap is open. PP

Lardness: The measure of fat/grease content in dirty beer glasses. SW

Madjunct: The addition of undesirable fermentables to the brew, eg: white sugar. SW

Maitbock: A strong Helles that attracts your friends, to the detriment of your beer stocks. WG

Malt: What your cat does over your good clothes and furniture. ST

Mash Tuna: The 'nice' description for the horrid stench that permeates your yard when forgetting to discard spent grain, and originates from within the brew rig. LZ

Moldification: The term given to incorrect grain storage. (See Vermination) SW

Racking Vane: A racking cane which no matter what you do, still sucks air. PP

Saad: Old Czech hops. (see Harshbrucker) WG

Saccharomyces Luvarum: Lager yeast that prefers a Bundy to Sugar. SW

Scheizenbier: The weizen that you got - infected. (see Wishbier) WG

sH: Alternative measure of bad brew. 1 being very good, 7 average, 14 is shitHouse. See also Alpha Acrid Unit. SW

Shopback: Returning to the HBS after forgetting something important. SW

Shytase: An enzyme that reduces the mash sH by creating shytic acid. SW

Single Infusion Smash: Internal meltdown of a brewer when inadvertently using a hydropmeter. SW

Slauter: The method of extracting too many tannins and wrecking what would otherwise be a perfectly good brew. SW

Spurge: What your body does the morning after a very heavy session. ST

Trubo: What you're in when the little lady finds out what the last piece of brewing equipment really cost. ST

Verminal Gravity: The term used for a happy brewer brought back down to earth after realising he's got an infection. SW

Vermination: This also happens to grain if not stored correctly. SW

Wishbier: Your beer, the way you hoped it would turn out. WG

CREDIT to humorous Brewsas so far goes to...

BD = Big D (1)
LZ = Linz (2)
ST = Stephen (7)
SW = Simon W (a whopping 23!)
WG = Weizguy (6)

God knows what goes on in these guys heads!

Cheers
PP :beer:

 

[Linz]

Barge arm: A piece of grain brewing equipment that no matter what speed it runs water in, it forces the grain bed to compact

 

[Simon W]

Alpha Acrid Unit - Measure(%) of how nasty a bad beer is. See also sH

Armylase - A militant enzyme group that kills enemy starch forces to create ally sugar forces, consisting primarily of alpha and beta armylase. Also referred to as the dieastatic enzymes.

Blocculation - The process of covering the fermenters tap with yeast cake.

Daught - Describes a person that thinks Draught comes from a can, and the brewery that thinks it belongs in it.

Dieastatic - Militant enzymes responsible for killing/immobilizing enemy starches. See also Armylase.

Fester - Volatile compound formed during fermentation that gives a beer a rotten, pungent or fetid yeast aroma.

Ilcohol - The substance that gives you a hangover.

Infussion - The internal meltdown of a brewer when he realises he's mashed at the wrong temperature.

Kisinglass - What a brewer does to a glass of crystal clear beer.

Lardness - The measure of fat/grease content in dirty beer glasses.

Madjunct - The addition of undesirable fermentables to the brew, eg: white sugar.

Moldification - The term given to incorrect grain storage.

Saccharomyces Luvarum - Lager yeast that prefers a Bundy to Sugar.

sH - Alternative measure of bad brew. 1 being very good, 7 average, 14 is shitHouse. See also Alpha Acrid Unit.

Shopback - Returning to the HBS after forgetting something important.

Slauter - The method of extracting too many tannins and wrecking what would otherwise be a perfectly good brew.

Verminal gravity - The term used for a happy brewer brought back down to earth after realising he's got an infection.

 

[Linz]

Mash Tuna - The 'nice' description for the horrid stench that permeates your yard when forgetting to discard spent grain, and originates from within the brew rig

 

[stephen]

Spurge - what your body does the morning after a very heavy session

 

[PistolPatch]

Actobacter - Acrobatics performed by lips, nose and mouth after tasting an acetobacter infection.

Corny Syrup - What comes out of your mouth when sitting next to an attractive person after way too many beers.

Condamination - Blame given by the brewer to evrything and everyone but themselves when they produce a fale or a flager (see fale and flager.)

Head Retension - The screwing up of the eyes whilst trying to remember what you're meant to be doing next whilst Fall Grain Brewing.

 

[Simon W]

hmmm 'The Pub' is for 'general chitchat'(ie: almost anything) and this is brewing related. Oh well.

 

[PistolPatch]

Looks like my idea to put a compilation of words occassionally into The Pub Forum was not a good idea! Whoops! Post Modern has kindly pasted the post below so I'll do as he suggests and occassionally put an up to date list in the first post of this thread.

You guys have come up with some wicked words!

 

[PostModern]

PistolPatch is a bit upset about the closing of this thread's clone in the Pub, so I've cut and pasted the hour's worth of formatted post here. PP, feel free to cut and past the formatted text from this post and stick it into your top post as you please. All the little "b"s and "/b"s are here to save you retyping.

Keep it up guys, some of these are pretty funny.

If you would like to contribute to the list, please do so only at the link provided at the end of this post as we dont want to get into trouble for getting The Pub too far off topic! If you would like to encourage this thread, praise a word or perhaps offer an improvement on an existing word you can probably do this here. To abuse this thread, see the end!

The most up to date list of 34 words and the contributors is/are as follows

Actobacter: Acrobatics performed by lips, nose and mouth after tasting an acetobacter infection. PP

Alpha Acrid Unit: Measure(%) of how nasty a bad beer is. (See also sH). SW

Armylase: A militant enzyme group that kills enemy starch forces to create ally sugar forces, consisting primarily of alpha and beta armylase. Also referred to as the dieastatic enzymes. SW

Barge Arm: A piece of grain brewing equipment that no matter what speed it runs water in, it forces the grain bed to compact. LZ

Blitch: Cleaning and sterilizing liquid found in various places. For example, blitch is often discovered in a hyphon that you thought was full of boiled water. A solution of blitch is also what you will find all your stainless steel soaking in 48 hours after a Fall Grain Brewing session. Liquid blitch often attacks the brewer's eyes whilst the aroma attacks the nostrils. (see Hyphon and Fall Grain Brewing). PP

Blocculation: The process of covering the fermenters tap with yeast cake. SW

Condamination: Blame given by the brewer to evrything and everyone but themselves when they produce a fale or a flager. (see Fale and Flager). PP

Corny Syrup: What comes out of your mouth when sitting next to an attractive person after way too many beers. PP

Daught: Describes a person that thinks Draught comes from a can, and the brewery that thinks it belongs in it. SW

Diestatic: Militant enzymes responsible for killing/immobilizing enemy starches. SW

Fale: Usually brewed at the beginning of one's homebrew career. You think the beer is great but your mates have one sip, leave you at home, and go to the pub. Uses top fermenting yeast. PP

Fall Grain Brewing: A method of brewing beer that takes so long, if you start drinking at the beginning you will fall down drunk well before the end of the process. PP

Fester: Volatile compound formed during fermentation that gives a beer a rotten, pungent or fetid yeast aroma. SW

Flager: Same as Fale yet brewed using a bottom fermenting yeast. Often brewed at the same temperature as a fale: 32 degrees (celcius!). PP

Flowmenter: The name briefly given to a fermenter at the time of the addition of wort whilst the tap is still open. (See Lamenter). PP

Head Retension: The screwing up of the eyes whilst trying to remember what you're meant to be doing next whilst Fall Grain Brewing. PP

Hyphon: A siphon so long you have to hyperventilate to get it going. PP

Ilcohol: The substance that gives you a hangover. SW

Infussion: The internal meltdown of a brewer when he realises he's mashed at the wrong temperature. SW

Iodidne: The steriliser you thought you added to water but 2 weeks later realise you actually didnt. PP

Kisinglass: What a brewer does to a glass of crystal clear beer. SW

Kit & Keelover: Brewing method used by 18 year olds in their first foray into homebrewing. Comprises a kit of No Brand Malt and 6 to 7 kilos of sugar. PP

Lamenter: The name given to a fermenter into which you have just started to siphon wort, the telephone rings and the fermenter tap is open. PP

Lardness: The measure of fat/grease content in dirty beer glasses. SW

Madjunct: The addition of undesirable fermentables to the brew, eg: white sugar. SW

Mash Tuna: The 'nice' description for the horrid stench that permeates your yard when forgetting to discard spent grain, and originates from within the brew rig. LZ

Moldification: The term given to incorrect grain storage. SW

Racking Vane: A racking cane which no matter what you do, still sucks air. PP

Saccharomyces Luvarum: Lager yeast that prefers a Bundy to Sugar. SW

sH: Alternative measure of a bad brew. 1 - very good, 7 - average, 14 - will make you spurge i.e. absolutely sHouse. (See also Spurge). SW

Shopback: Returning to the HBS after forgetting something important. SW

Slauter: The method of extracting too many tannins and wrecking what would otherwise be a perfectly good brew. SW

Spurge: What your body does the morning after a very heavy session. ST

Verminal Gravity: The term used for a happy brewer brought back down to earth after realising he's got an infection. SW

Thats it for the moment! If you would like to add a word please go to Brewsa Invitational 2006.

When I update the above list I will simply modify this post and add a further post at the end of the thread saying what new words have been included. This will save reading the above words over and over. Hope this is OK with everyone! (If you hate the idea of a very occasional update being posted in this forum I think you press Report Post below!)

Cheers
PP

CREDIT to humorous Brewsas so far goes to...

LZ = Linz (2)
ST = Stephen (1)
SW = Simon W (17)

God knows what goes on in these guys heads!

 

[Simon W]

PP, it's OK dude, don't let the shift sour your experience with the forum to date. The mods have to keep things from getting out of control, if it wasn't PostMod, it would have been somone else.
Probably didn't help that I had a go at Alien Boy. So I'm equally to blame.

Hey, this thread is still active, so we can still have fun

 

[stephen]

Brix - The dude with the first name Hans looking for bombs in your brewhouse.

Air lock - what your nose does when it smells the after effects of an infection.

Trubo - what you're in when the little lady finds out what the last piece of brewing equipment really cost.

 

[PostModern]

Brix - The dude with the first name Hans looking for bombs in your brewhouse.

[post="107681"][/post]​

LOL. You're bustin' my balls, Hans Brix.

 

[PistolPatch]

Ah! All is back on track. Thanks for throwing the post back in PostModern.

As I said above (in my modified post!), these words are cracking me up - trubo, shopback - how true!

 

[big d]

hopnoid-ala paranoid over hop failure

 

[Simon W]

Decocktion - A particularly nasty brewhouse accident, please be carefull.

Drunkel - Word to describe a person thats had too many Munich darks.

Hydropmeter - Instrument used to measure effect of Height on Smashiness. Note: Single use only.

Shytase - An enzyme that reduces the mash sH by creating shytic acid.

Single Infussion Smash - Internal meltdown of a brewer when inadvertently using a hydropmeter.

Vermination - This also happens to grain if not stored correctly. See Moldification

Edit: bettererifying

 

[stephen]

Malt - What your cat does over your good clothes and furniture.

Krausing - What you do when you use your hydropmeter.

 

[PistolPatch]

My goodness - Stephen is getting lazy! Come on Steve, you have to at least change one letter!!!! Big D went to a vast effort and changed several! Lift your game or you will be in serious trubo! (I have sent you a PM regarding your total disregard for the strict guidelines that have held this thread together for so long - it's been 4 days now!)

There's always one!

Steve, try and be a team player from now on. Simon, Linz, BigD and myself are very dissapointed in you!

We're up to 46 words now Steve and with the addition of the words below, we'll have hit 49. When we reach 50, I'll update the original post, so the pressure is on. I know you work late and won't be reading this until about 1am. Treat this as a chance to redeem yourself! In fact, we need 2 words - one to replace, 'malt'!

My new, and I must say, probably pretty weak words, are:

Attenulation: The attention applied too late to a kettle approaching the boil.

Heat Slink: The silent creeping walk adopted by a married brewer away from the stove after a boil-over.

Intoxification: Inebriation experienced once a year by tourists in Italy during the running of the bulls.

Thanks, so far, for all the words. I and my friends, male and female, have all had a good laugh although I had to explain quite a few of them - trubo was the favourite amongst the girls, Steve! (We played Balderdash a few nights ago!)

Cheers all!

 

[Weizguy]

Wishbier - your beer, the way U hoped it would turn out

Scheizenbier - The weizen that you got (infected)

Hellertau - 18 month old hops, suitable only for lambic

Harshbrucker - another type of aged German hop

Saad - old Czech hops

Maitbock - a strong Helles that attracts your friends, to the detriment of your beer stocks.

 

[stephen]

Klettle - noise your hydropmeter makes on a ceramic tiled floor.

Now that's 50!!!

 

[PistolPatch]

Brewsa Invitaional 2006 Update

Hi All!

Have just updated the word list in the first post of this thread. Thanks Steve, I knew you'd come through with the goods again! And thanks Weizguy for your late hop additions!

Once we run out of words, I suppose we can amuse ourselves by combining the words into sentences. (My goodness! I think it's really time that I got another girlfriend!!!)

If I've made any errors, or you have any improvements to the 1 or 2 edits I've done, please let me know and I'll fix it.

Cheers
PP :beer: