Continuing Rant Thread - Get it Off Ya Chest here

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Mattress said:
I just hope they have decent beer at Suncorp Stadium.
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Happy birthday, Mattress.

Agree about the Scratch being good for a beer. The Statler & Waldorf on Caxton St has a decent selection of beer (as an example, Holgate usually features prominently), plus much, much better food than you'll ever get at Suncorp. Went there for my birthday lunch and had pulled pork burgers and pork belly paddle pops. So. Good.
 
Black Devil Dog said:
What is "slowly pealing"?



That caption should read "The Belle was ******* unappealing".
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You have to put it in context. To a Victorian gentleman, a stout woman with an strong back, robust ankle and wrist joints was sexier than Nigella Lawson seductively licking vanilla frosting off her index finger.

If she could drag a hapless sheep from a peat bog and nurse an infant on her hip whilst rolling bed sheets through the mangle you were on a winner.
 
I think that trying to get past all that whale bone and ironmongery they had in the undergarments would have dampened the sexual ardour, or premature ejaculation would have been rife in those days.
 
She could probably milk a dozen cows by hand, make a huge pot of porridge, feed husband and her 8 children, get them ready for school, as well as get the fire going and boil the copper for hot water, all before the sun came up.

Plus keep herself looking super hot, while doing all that, definitely a keeper.
 
'Cos wanking over mental images of kids and sheep is somewhat frowned upon in contemporary society?
 
Back when women were real women ey :D


Their still around these days, just seem to be better looking then that poor ugly wench. (Sorry if she is part of someones family tree around here)
 
Maybe she fell out of the family tree,and hit every branch on the way down. :)
 
Prince Imperial said:
If you don't already write erotic fiction, why not?
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Let you in on a little secret, 'EL James' is a pseudonym..
 
Mattress said:
Next week I'm "celebrating" one of those birthdays that ends in a 0

About a year ago my closest mates decided we would celebrate by going to Brisbane this weekend and watch the Wallabies beat the All Blacks and win back the Bledisloe Cup.

The stars were aligning - new coach, new team and it was my birthday. How could it not happen. Flights, hotel and tickets all booked.

1st sign that things were going wrong - ANHC organised for the same weekend in my home town. Bugger.

Then the Wallabies drew the 1st test with New Zealand. Oh well, cant win the cup, should still be a good game of rugby.

Now the Wallabies have descended into chaos. Rumors of the coach having an inappropriate relationship with the teams business manager, details of derogatory and sexist emails by the players leaked to the media, players stood down pending disciplinary hearings, coach will be lucky to have a job next week, team disharmony a few days before a test match.

I just hope they have decent beer at Suncorp Stadium.
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If you head up the North West corner of the ground at aisle 337, there's a public bar behind the food outlet there that serves packaged dbeer as opposed to the regular bars that serve Gold and HPL only. This bar has a relatively decent range, from Heineken, TED, Corona, 150 Lashes, Super Dry etc. It will be very busy there though, and the bar is open for up to an hour post game.

For my own planned rant, went out to buy some shorts this morning and found at both Lowes and BigW the bloody only half decent shorts had these pissy frigging hip pockets that are only bloody 3/4 size in depth, won't even fully hold a wallet. Are the bloody manufacturers that desperate that they have to friggin' cut down on pocket material to cover the $1.80/hr wages they pay out? Really pissed off.
 
Buy a bum bag mate or if you are American a fanny pack. Be good if you could by a pack of fannys though.

"I have a sex addiction- Im a pack a day man."
 
Bloody polititians, hate the prick that's in power but the other options arn't that much better.

That's my rant, feeling better now.
 
Eagleburger said:
****, i have to get up to make another coffee.
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Same here,and we are running low on rainwater with no rain insight for weeks,and it's going to be a shitty 34 degrees today with strong north winds.......ahh grumble grumble and grumble again.
 
I can generally forgive someone ******* up their there/their/they're (um...... ' )s 'cause realistically the english language is a bit of a prick with that sort of stuff and its always changing and shit.....But, my anus gets so massively traumatised whenever someone refers to a Belguim style beer so bad that I need to go and try to forget about it by downing 15 pints of traditional england bitter.

Anyway.....I've got an arvo ahead of me on the ride on performing the anglo's zen garden (or mowing the lawn if you wish) so I goes on down to my closest BWS to get a handful of swillers to down while I rock bitchin' metal and punk rocks on the headphones and tame 2 acres of lawn (never.....ever.......live somewhere where there is that much lawn unless you can contain a couple of goats or similar there).

See some Feral White in the fridge and think that will suit, what with the sun being out and all so I go for it. I'm just about to jump start the ride on after cracking one open when I see it:

Belgonian.jpg

My brain literally explodes.

Liek, who in the **** let that slip through to the keeper? Youse carnt evun spell properlies over their in WA? Being the internets with its anonmynities and the ability to spit bile without repercussion , I feel I need to finish with something like "**** you Brendan Varis, learn the difference between a nation and nationality or get AIDS and die.......I'll never drink your beer again", buuuuuuuttttt.....I'm just going to drink those 4 beers and get on with lief. ****. Life. And buy more beer from Feral when the need arises.
 
I hate ******* so called ******* friends who think it's ******* cool to hit on my ******* wife. Felt like punching someone's head in..... Although my lovely wife isn't the problem she told him to **** off.
 
Even worse the stupid krint thinks he's welcome to come to my Rabbitoh bar and sit on my Rabbitoh stools and ******* drink my awesome beer ! Don't think so chuckles
 
jkhlt1210 said:
I hate ******* so called ******* friends who think it's ******* cool to hit on my ******* wife. Felt like punching someone's head in..... Although my lovely wife isn't the problem she told him to **** off.
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That's not a friend. Delete from your life.

Edit: I realise how redundant that advice probably is, I was in the gym at the time and that was the best I could manage haha.

I've been there. Had really good friends you thought you could trust. Life is so much ******* better without them.
 

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