Can someone please recommend me a beer?

[Scooby Tha Newbie]

Thanks all



I know, not really a good set of requirements on what could be considered a "beer snob" site (no offence)

That I feel isn't fair to the people in this site.

 

[stonedpirate]

I would suggest going to Dan's and just going to the single beer fridge and picking up 10-20 single beers. One of everything.

Thats good advice, i will do that next time. Just got back from Dans with a carton of Coopers Pilsner 62. I think I might have picked a dud going by beer advocate reviews. Will see for myself when they get cold. Went looking for Oettinger Pils Cans 500mL or Pilsner Urquell as per suggestions on this site but they didnt have either so i chose the coopers 62 because it looked fancy in premium looking bottles.

I noticed that pretty much every beer has close to 5 stars on the dan murphy site and most beers rank poorly on beer advocate so i guess i just have to make up my own mind.

I'm no troll, just thought it would be easier asking the experts to help me narrow down a beer before spending thousands trying heaps i dont like.

Bought some random Jap beer called Sapporo to start me off and see how it goes.

I considered cider but the word cider reminds me of old nannas for some reason and only girls drink it even though it is quite tasty like gummy bear juice.

That I feel isn't fair to the people in this site.

Fair enough, my apologies. I would only apply it to people here that can taste the whiff of a salty summers breeze rounding out to an austrian medow in beer.

 

[stonedpirate]

Ok, maybepilsner 62 is not a dud after reading more reviews. The foreigners claim its typically weak watery aussie beer and the locals thinks its cold crisp and goes down smooth. I have a feeling that my style of beer would rank low on the beer snob scale so it might be a winner afterall.

 

[Liam_snorkel]

Let your own tastebuds decide

 

[stonedpirate]

Yeah, i guess thats the only way

Dan Murphy rates just about everything 5 stars because i figure that only customers who buy the products regularly review the products so if their spending money on it they obviously like it.

Beer Advocate and other foreign beer review sites rate all australian beer as duds.

 

[manticle]

Commercially, try and find Warka Strong and Budvar super strong.

No-one on a brewing site should be judging people on the amount they drink. if it's a troll - so be it. Troll wins an award for making someone on the internet answer their question.

Stonedpirate - many people drink and have drunk cider throughout history. Some of them are women, some aren't. if you like the taste, you can make it very easily and make a strong version very easily.

 

[stonedpirate]

Thanks Manticle.

Well, after more beer experimentation i think i am closing in on my staple.

Firstly, after 8 coopers pilsner 62s, verdict, hate them. Flat, no head and has a funky background taste.

Warka Strong and Budvar super strong

I will try and seek those out.

I will continue to try new beers but after tonight, a mate gave me an ice cold emu export and it has changed my mind. Its watery, almost tastless and cold with reasonable alcohol if i drink them quickly. Break up the night with one tasty cider. I would go full cider but they are just too sweet and after several and they give me acid reflux so i will use them as a dessert and as an intermission. I find that i like all ciders, from full apple through to girly pink strawberry and mixed berries. They are just an alcoholic fruit cordial with bubbles so i doubt anyone would dislike them exept for maybe hitler or young men on a macho trip.

So for now, the staple is emu export and one or two ciders of any type.

If i find an emu export with 3 or more % higher alcohol i'm set.

Then if i can find a way to brew it on my own for cheaper than commericial over the long haul, even better.

Cheers all

 

[stonedpirate]

Ok, the saga continues.

A guy on another forum called me a retard for pouring pilsners at 4 degrees celcius straight out of the fridge.

In the name of honesty and fairness, i kept one out of the frige and warmed it up to around 14c.

Nice head now, more fizz but the same weird back flavour and now warmer and more funky.

+10 points for more fizz but -50 for intensified funkiness and warmness on a hot aussie night.

Pilsner just aint for me.

Pale ale, same boat.

Its got to be lager, got to be cold and watery.

The foreigners might knock us for our watery tastless beer but they have never lived in the desert before and probably never did a hard days work in their life either.

FDifferent strokes for different folks i guess.

If emu export is coons piss then i'm just a coon piss drinker f it.

 

[Econwatson]

I think you're getting into brewing for the wrong reasons but best of luck to you in your endeavours.

 

[mxd]

try the kolsch I mentioned earlier

 

[acarey]

pacific ale. I defy anyone to not like this beer. Stupidly drinkable but only standard strength.

 

[sp0rk]

I think the problem with the ciders you've been drinking is they're all the mass marketed cordial kind
Try a good proper British cider or a scrumpy, most of the Weston's ciders are pretty decent

 

[DJ_L3ThAL]

Instead of spending money taking a punt at whatever label grabs your attention in Dans, how about you spend some time researching beer style and descriptions one night that are more in line with what you are after, it won't be very hard.

So far you've had ales and lagers and mostly 'megaswill' which in some shape or form will always have what you are deeming a "funky" taste.

Also super cold = no taste, because the cold temperature masks a lot of the flavours. So perhaps if you better inform yourself on such things it will help you decide truly what is the style you like.

Pilsners are generally bitter, so I'd suggest steering clear of those, perhaps if you go to the start of this post and do the researching thing I suggested it will help.

Sorry if I come across as blunt.

 

[stonedpirate]

Speaking of chilled, i just had a beer that blew my mind.

Left it in the freezer for too long.

It was still liquid in the bottle.

As i poured it into my glass, it turned to ice. Now i have a beer that has a tiny bit of liquid and a hude head of ice.

Its like a beer slushy.

Quite tasty.

Will try more ciders as suggested and will do more research on style.

Cheers

 

[manticle]

pacific ale. I defy anyone to not like this beer. Stupidly drinkable but only standard strength.

OP wants a non hoppy beer.

I don't like it much by the way. Consider me defied.

 

[acarey]

OP wants a non hoppy beer.

I don't like it much by the way. Consider me defied.

Yeah I know, I just think this one is different to the hoppieness/bitterness that the OP might be objecting to. To me its a very crisp, clean tasting beer that lots of my 'non beery' friends enjoy.

Re: you not liking it, that's fine. You are just wrong . Kidding obviously.

 

[Liam_snorkel]

It tastes like pasito.

 

[Spiesy]

It tastes like pasito.

I quite like Pasito. And passion fruit.

 

[manticle]

Re: you not liking it, that's fine. You are just wrong . Kidding obviously.

I don't think it's a bad beer by any stretch- just too much galaxy and not enough malt for my palate.

I am often wrong though.

 

[TimT]

Hey, you could try Grand Ridge Breweries Moonshine - a Dark Scotch ale. 8.5 per cent alcohol, a wonderful maltiness and sweetness; it is low-hopped but I suspect the dark malts provide a lot of the bitterness. I've had it twice and loved it. Check out their list of beers; you might also like the Hatlifter Stout or the Supershine.

http://www.grand-ridge.com.au/our_beer_.html

 

[Logman]

I can relate to this because I went off beer for some time and drank spirits, eventually decided after 5 or so years they were just too easy to drink so I went back to beer and found my taste buds had changed a lot.

As a youngster I just drank XXXX all night, but after being a spirits drinker that totally changed and I started to drink many different beers in a session - plus I wasn't such a 'gulper'. These days I generally drink Pale Ale, then IPA, then Stout (more and more flavor). You can nurse your taste buds along through the session as each beer isn't doing the business.

Try some some beers like Coopers Dark Ale, Newcastle Brown Ale, even a Guinness - you might find a beer that you're happy to switch to after a few beers quench the thirst.

 

[acarey]

just too much galaxy and not enough malt for my palate.

Yeah, different strokes for different folks. I use it as a session beer I find its dryness and 'not much maltiness' really nice in that situation.

Its stops me from having sessions on my 9% IIPA and cracking my head on the bathroom floor again h34r:

 

[manticle]

I have a special helmet.

 

[zarniwoop]

Ok now this could be entirely co-inicidental and not the same OP but a quick google search on the OP's username reveals the following activity at other forums over the few years:

Bicycle Network Australia:

http://www.bicycles.net.au/forums/viewtopic.php?f=12&t=29340&hilit=stonedpirate%C2 - Plans to ride around Australia on a bicycle, thread is basically a windup, final comment from site admin before he's banned and thread is locked is: For the record, the user stonedpirate was warned already for personal attacks which breach the forum guidelines.The posters last post (before being banned) will remain - though if you feel it has no place here - pm me and it will be removed. Sorry, but a lot of members got sucked into trying to provide genuine feedback and help for this poor soul who was just taking us for a ride.

http://www.bicycles.net.au/forums/viewtopic.php?f=12&t=29330&sid=51315aa7e9886a47c30ce114d77b1e72%C2 - Asks for critique of cycling performance diet that involves 20 hours fasting - gets various levels of disbelief type comments.

Woodwork forums - presumably the boat building part:

http://www.woodworkforums.com/f32/anyone-experienced-ply-115874-print/ - asks for advice on building an ocean going ten foot boat when he has no experience with boat building, final comment from site admin is:

Stoned Pirate,
You have asked questions of experienced builders and sailors.
Having received that advice, freely, you seem to place little value on it.

Your initial post provided very little information about the information that you actually sought. Instead, you seemed to assume others have knowledge of your endeavors from other web forums to this one. Nowhere did you mention an attempt to circumnavigate or a need to break a record until much later in the thread, after a number of posts by yourself and others.

It is clear the lack of success with a suitable response is the result of a failure to provide adequate initial information by yourself. Your attitude indicates a personality ideally suited for solo navigation, well in advance of your knowledge and skills preparation.

Consequently, It is our feeling that you should desist.....plainly put...STOP, and whenever or indeed, if, you mature enough to understand the advice offered to you, that you have enough sense to take it.
Until then, please cease your pollution of a very benign, and knowledgeable forum

Regards,
Noel Watson
Administrator


Now as I said before this may be a completely differnent OP and if so my apologies for making the connection but personally I don't think I'll be suggesting anything more.

 

[manticle]

We are talking about helmets now

 

[zarniwoop]

Sorry missed one:http://www.aussiestockforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=20934 - Wants to trade family and friends money in foreign exchange deals.

But I don't own a helmet!

 

[Liam_snorkel]

hahaha that's great. Yasmani? Is that you?

 

[Three Sheets]

Hi Pirate. Assuming you are not baiting the forum, the beers you've tried are pretty bland. Takes a while to appreciate different beers and indeed beer in general, you just cant love it from your first one. I'd work your way through the James Squire beers to find the style you like (as suggested by other). If you seek to get hammered you could punish a carton of Coopers Sparkling Ale, that can do a nice job.

As for a staple quick brew, I use to do a lot of Coopers Canadian blonde to fill the masses. (tweak as you desire)

I know about rum crazy and rarely go past two spirits. Beer is good, because God wants us to be happy.

Cheers

TS

 

[Spiesy]

Sorry missed one:http://www.aussiestockforums.com/forums/showthread.php?t=20934 - Wants to trade family and friends money in foreign exchange deals.

But I don't own a helmet!

Maybe stonedpirate was just drunk whilst posting on those other forums?

 

[Liam_snorkel]

Aw, can we keep him? Trolls can be fun as long as things don't get out of hand.