# Dumbasses (safe For Work)



## Doc (21/12/04)

I only have two pet hates. Stupid people and graffitti. This story really makes you wonder about some people in the world. 

Doc

*Traffic stop leads to big drug bust*

LANCASTER COUNTY, PA - Two Reading men who police said were caught driving through Millersville with 33 bags of cocaine, 34 tablets of ecstasy, a small bag of marijuana, a six-pack of beer, a loaded handgun and two open bottles of alcohol were ordered last week to stand trial.

The driver, Antoine Lamar Shirley, 22, of 922 Old Wyomissing Road, initially was charged with one count each of possession of a firearm without a license, possession of a small amount of marijuana, making an illegal U-turn, driving the wrong way down a one-way street, driving with a suspended license and two counts of possession with intent to deliver. He later was charged with one count each of receiving stolen property and criminal conspiracy.

His passenger, Tridariaus Simmons, 20, of 632 N. 13th St., was charged with selling a firearm without a license, possession of a firearm without a license, possession of a small amount of marijuana, underage drinking and two counts of possession with intent to deliver.

Millersville University police Chief Wayne Silcox testified Monday he was on patrol in an unmarked car with Sgt. Joyce Rutecki just after midnight Oct. 24 when he noticed a maroon Dodge make a U-turn and almost hit another car at Brooks Drive and Lyte Road, near Gilbert Hall on the MU campus.

Under questioning by Assistant District Attorney Chad Foster, Silcox said he had been working since 7 a.m. the previous day because it was the university's homecoming weekend.

After the U-turn, the car went the wrong way on North Prince Street against one-way traffic, Silcox said. That's when he and Rutecki attempted to stop the vehicle.

The car didn't immediately stop, according to a criminal complaint filed by Rutecki, but entered the parking lot of a local restaurant, bouncing over a curb before coming to a halt. Silcox said the car then "took off" when he got out of his vehicle.

"It finally stopped in the first block of South Prince Street," he said. "I saw an open bottle of Corona in the front seat between the two people, and I noticed an odor of alcohol."

Silcox said he called for backup, then asked the driver to get out of the car so he could perform a sobriety test.

"He said the vehicle belonged to his Aunt Shirley," Silcox said. "I found that rather odd, because you wouldn't think someone would be named Shirley Shirley."

Shirley said he didn't have his license with him and didn't have the vehicle's registration either, Silcox said.

"I asked if I could look in the glove box because sometimes people keep their registration information in there," Silcox said. "There was no hesitation. He said, 'Go ahead.'"

University police Officer Jonathan Welsh arrived in response to Silcox's backup call and testified Monday he heard Shirley consent to the search of the glove box.

Silcox said he found a loaded .45 Ruger handgun in the glove box, along with 7.75 grams of cocaine and 34 tablets of ecstasy, which amounted to 10.25 grams of MDMA, the active ingredient in ecstacy.

Below the drivers' seat were .5 grams of marijuana, Silcox said. Also in the car were six full bottles of beer and four partially consumed ones, according to Rutecki's report.

Attorney Douglas Cody represented Shirley, and attorney Michael V. Marinaro represented Simmons.

Under cross-examination from the defense attorneys, Silcox said both suspects were cooperative after they exited the vehicle. Shirley's Breathalyzer test showed a .012 blood alcohol content, well below the legal limit.

"It did indicate he had been drinking, though," Silcox said.

Millersville District Justice Leo Eckert determined there was enough evidence to send the men's cases to trial.

Shirley and Simmons are expected to enter pleas Jan. 26.


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## Doc (21/12/04)

Closely followed by this dumbass.

CANBERRA, Australia - An Italian tourist aboard a flight from Sydney to Vienna caused an international security alert after he sent a joke text message from his cell phone to his wife claiming his plane had been hijacked by terrorists, the Australian government confirmed Sunday. The man, Antonio Casale, 35, sent the message to his wife from Kuala Lumpur during a refueling stop on a Lauda Air flight from Sydney last Sunday night, Sydneys Sunday Telegraph newspaper reported. Transport Minister John Andersons spokesman confirmed the newspaper report. Casale claimed terrorists were in control of the plane and were taking the passengers to an unknown destination. His distressed wife contacted Italian police, who immediately contacted the Italian embassy in Canberra, who in turn contacted Australian Federal Police. Andersons spokesman said authorities were able to quickly establish Casales identity and discover the message was a hoax.


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## Bobby (21/12/04)

this is a funny read about an attempted ebay scam.
http://www.zug.com/pranks/powerbook/


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## MCWB (21/12/04)

Hahaha I love the PPPowerbook! :lol:

And of the subject of dumbasses, I present this fine fellow to you:


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## Doc (21/12/04)

:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: just read the Powerbook article.
Very very funny and deserving.

Doc


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## Doc (21/12/04)

Great one MCWB.
You get bitten by a deadly snake. Then you put your hand in the bag again. Double DUMBASS.
Maybe I can move this thread to the pub now, because that article had the word 'beer' in it  

These dumbasses are putting a real smile on my face today. :lol: :lol: 

Doc


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## Doc (26/12/04)

*Man rescued from clothing bin*
December 26, 2004

OFFICERS from the Police Rescue Squad have freed a man who was found wedged head-first in a clothing bin in the inner-Sydney suburb of Surry Hills early today.

Police were approached at about 12.15 am (AEDT) by a resident who reported seeing a person apparently trapped in a St Vincent de Paul clothing donation bin in Belvoir Street.

Police said that when they arrived they found what at first glance appeared to be a woman wearing a tight mini-skirt trapped halfway inside the bin, hanging head-down inside.

A closer inspection revealed that it was a 35-year-old man from Glebe.

The two officers were unable to release the man and called in the Rescue Squad, and the man was freed a short time later. 

He told police he was donating clothes when he became stuck.


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## Doc (26/12/04)

and another

A boy racer lost his licence after speeding past a speed camera 19 times in a single night. The teenager swapped his cars number plate with a fake one and deliberately raced past the camera. The unnamed 19-year-old and his three friends were snapped in various poses - usually hanging out of the car windows making obscene gestures and believing police would not be able to trace them. They were recorded at speeds almost three times the legal 30mph limit. But police in Bern, Switzerland circulated the images to their patrol units and the teenage racer was stopped as he set off home in the yellow Citroen with the fake plates still attached.


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## Jim_Levet (26/12/04)

This is what Christmas is all about. Obviously this guy had a belly full of his home brew and decided he could clean out the closets. Looks like he came out of the closet at the same time.

Police rescue man wedged in clothing bin
17:47 AEDT Sun Dec 26 2004


Obviously in this case I am the DUMBASS for not seeing that the good Dr had already posted the same story. 
You have to be quick!


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## Doc (19/1/05)

This guy definitely qualifies as a dumbass.



> A MAN charged with possessing counterfeit money tried to pay his bail with fake cash.
> 
> Darrell Jenkins of Springfield, Massachusetts, in the US, was ordered to pay 264 bail in exchange for his freedom.
> 
> That figure was increased to 2,640 after he tried to dupe the court into accepting dodgy notes.



And I bet he still pleads not guilty when he goes to court because he is such a *dumbass*

Doc


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## dreamboat (19/1/05)

that powerbook caper is the funniest thing I have ever read.... just classic



dreamboat


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## Backlane Brewery (19/1/05)

There are a few threads here from a guy who responds to those Nigerian fraud spam emails.Some of the discussion he has about meeting up with these guys get quite surreal, but he reels the scammers in & in & in...


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## Doc (21/1/05)

This guy needs to be taught how to brew beer :lol: 

Doc

*Man hides in Czech pizzeria for beer access*

PRAGUE, Czech Republic (AP) - It will be the most expensive keg of beer he's ever had. 

A 32-year-old Czech man got himself locked up in a pizzeria in the town of Brno late Wednesday to have free access to beer overnight. When the restaurant's staff left, he broke into a cooling box containing a keg, disconnected the pipes leading to the tap, put them in his mouth and drank as much as he could. 

The man, drunk and fast asleep, was found by cleaners in the early hours of Thursday. 

Vit Cvrcek, a police spokesman, said he will now have to pay for the beer he drank and faces up to one year in prison or a fine of about $425 Cdn for the damage he caused to the cooling box.


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## Backlane Brewery (1/2/05)

Check this idiot out...

Gollum joker rail horror 
LORD Of The Rings fan Julian Brooker was electrocuted on a rail line while imitating his favourite character Gollum.The 23-year-old scampered about on all fours like the 4ft hobbit and then pretended to touch a live track to impress his boozy friends.But Julian accidentally DID touch the 750-volt third rail.His horrified pals watched as a bolt of electricity blew him 15ft in the air and turned into a fireball.Tragedy struck after he and pals spent a night drinking on the beach near his Brighton home on October 23 last year.Friend Eva Natasha wept as she told an inquest how they went to London Road station at 4am and began playing the Gollum game.She described how sales assistant Julian clambered from the platform on to the line. She said: He touched a rail and pretended to be electrocuted. I didnt find it funny, but assumed he knew what he was doing.Then he touched the live rail once. He wouldnt have touched it if he had known it was live.Locals heard Julians pals screaming and dialled 999 but he was certified dead at the scene. Yesterdays hearing was told Julian often got on all fours and pretended he was the evil character from the hit movie trilogy.Mum Vivienne Chauhan said: It was a game from Lord Of The Rings. He was always larking about. Hed do it in the house and say he was off creeping. East Sussex coroner Veronica Hamilton-Deeley was also told Brooker was a keen numerologist obsessed with the number 23 and went drinking on that date every month.
Verdict: Accidental death. 

If you go here, the UK Sun's website you can see a picture of this twat as well.


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## Doc (2/2/05)

Attnang - Two teenage crooks, who stole 43 car radios in a single night, were caught after police followed their footprints in the snow.

The pair decided snow would be the perfect cover to rob dozens of cars as roads were impassable and they doubted police would be on patrol.

But they forgot about the tell-tale footprints in the snow, which led officers from one car to the next and finally to the flat rented by the two 19-year-olds.

Police officers described their flat, in Attnang, Upper Austria, as an "Aladdin's cave" of stolen goods.

Central Europe has experienced the heaviest snowfalls in some areas since 1941 with many roads completely blocked for days.

The pair confessed to dozens of thefts in the area and also named three friends who had helped them with their crimes. - Ananova.com


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## Bobby (2/2/05)

i was going to put this on ebay however it isnt brew related so more apt here.

everyone is out for an easy buck on ebay these days
http://cgi.ebay.com/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewI...ssPageName=WDVW


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## Duff (3/2/05)

FW: Top 8 Morons of 2004


1. WILL THE REAL DUMMY PLEASE STAND UP? 

AT&T fired President John Walter after nine months, saying he lacked intellectual leadership. He received a $26 million severance package. Perhaps it's not Walter who's lacking intelligence.


2. WITH A LITTLE HELP FROM OUR FRIENDS: 

Police in Oakland, CA spent two hours attempting to subdue a gunman who had barricaded himself inside his home. After firing ten tear gas canisters, officers discovered that the man was standing beside them in the police line, shouting, "Please
come out and give yourself up."


3. WHAT WAS PLAN B??? 

An Illinois man, pretending to have a gun, kidnapped a motorist and forced him to drive to two different automated teller machines, wherein the kidnapper proceeded to withdraw money from his own bank accounts.


4. THE GETAWAY! 

A man walked into a Topeka, Kansas Kwik Stop and asked for all the money in the cash drawer. Apparently, the take was too small, so he tied up the store clerk and worked the counter himself for three hours until police showed up and grabbed him.


5. DID I SAY THAT??? 

Police in Los Angeles had good luck with a robbery suspect who just couldn't control himself during a lineup. When detectives asked each man in the lineup to repeat the words: "Give me all your money or I'll shoot", the man shouted, "that's not what I
said!".


6. ARE WE COMMUNICATING??? 

A man spoke frantically into the phone: "My wife is pregnant and her contractions are only two minutes apart". "Is this her first child?" the doctor asked. "No!" the man shouted, "This is her husband!"


7. NOT THE SHARPEST TOOL IN THE SHED! 

In Modesto, CA, Steven Richard King was arrested for trying to hold up a Bank of America branch without a weapon. King used a thumb and a finger to simulate a gun...Unfortunately, he failed to keep his hand in his pocket. (hellooooooo)!


8. THE GRAND FINALE!!! 

Last summer, down on Lake Isabella, located in the high desert, an hour east of Bakersfield, CA, some folks, new to boating, were having a problem. No matter how hard they tried, they couldn't get their brand new 22 foot boat going. It was very sluggish in almost every maneuver, no matter how much power they applied. After
about an hour of trying to make it go, they putted into a nearby marina, thinking someone there may be able to tell them what was wrong. A thorough topside check revealed everything in perfect working condition. The engine ran fine, the out-drive went up and down, and the propeller was the correct size and pitch. So, one of the marina guys jumped in the water to check underneath. He came up choking on water, he was laughing so hard. Under the boat, still strapped securely in place, was the trailer.

<_<


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## Backlane Brewery (4/2/05)

Or, perhaps, "Dumb things to do to your ass". You'd have to be a pretty desperate alky to try this.


> Husband dies after sherry enema
> February 4, 2005 - 9:19AM
> A US woman has been indicted on negligent homicide charges for allegedly giving her alcoholic husband a sherry enema that killed him.
> Michael Warner, 58, died last May after the enema caused his blood-alcohol level to rise to .47 per cent.
> ...


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## Backlane Brewery (9/3/05)

From today's Age.

Man survives 'contract' he took out on own life
By John Silvester March 9, 2005

In Melbourne's underworld war, police have often investigated cases where gangsters have taken out contracts to kill each other. But in the past few days they have investigated a contract with a twist.

In this case the would-be victim took out a contract on his own life. The Caulfield North man, 30, paid two young men $5000 each to kill him. In the bizarre case, the "target" told the men he wanted to commit suicide but was frightened he would botch the job. He asked them to help. His plan was to take sleeping pills then, if he was still alive 10 minutes later, the men were to kill him with an iron bar.

On Friday the three drove in the "target's" car to Gembrook. The man with the death wish and the would-be contract killers, both 18, searched for a cliff where they could dispose of the dead body. They found some tea rooms, antique shops, a lavender farm and Puffing Billy train tracks, but no cliffs suitable for dumping a body.

According to police, the "target" told his assistants that they would have to move to Plan B. The hastily arranged alternative was that the body was to be hidden in some bushes. He then took two boxes of sleeping pills. But, instead of slipping into a coma, he began to convulse on the ground. His employees then grabbed the large iron bar from the car and struck him two or three times on the head. Satisfied they had completed their mission, they left, not bothering to roll the body out of sight.

But the victim had both an iron stomach and a thick skull. He came to and was later found, bloodied and disoriented, staggering down Macclesfield Road. 
He was taken to the Angliss Hospital in Ferntree Gully and treated. He was later transferred to The Alfred hospital psychiatric ward as a non-voluntary patient.

The two men, who have not been in any previous trouble with police, have been interviewed by detectives and are believed to have made full confessions. The "target's" car was found outside their house. It is believed the pair spent the $10,000 on top-shelf alcohol, a box of Cuban cigars and mobile phones. They are expected to be charged on summons with attempted murder.


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## Doc (17/3/05)

Even he admits he is a dumbass :lol:

Beers,
Doc

*Man With 'TIPSY' Plate Faces DUI Charges *

MOORHEAD, Minn. - Having a vanity plate that reads "TIPSY" may not be such a great idea after all. Josiah Johnson, 23, said his license plate might have tipped off the Clay County sheriff's deputy who pulled him over Friday after he left Coach's Sports Pub in Moorhead. 

Now he faces third-degree drunken driving charges after his blood-alcohol level allegedly registered twice the legal limit. 

Johnson said he bought the personalized license plate for his Jeep to describe the way it rode then kept it as a joke when he got a Chevy Silverado because he likes to party. 

"It doesn't mean I drink and drive," he said. "It just means I have a good time." 

Johnson, who was slated to appear in court March 22, said he'll never drink and drive again. 

"I feel really stupid," he said.


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## Backlane Brewery (31/3/05)

A dumbass AND a lardass...



> Boozy burglar rang police 29 March 2005
> A boozed-up burglar broke into a cafe - then called police when he got stuck in a window trying to escape, a court heard today.
> Christopher Kelman, 34, of Didcot, Oxfordshire, raided the drinks cabinet at the Upper Crust buffet on platform three of Swindon railway station on January 30 this year. He forced entry by pushing up the shutters. After quenching his thirst with three cans of Stella Artois and three bottles of Budweiser, he decided to leave.
> But he chose the wrong window - one which was far too small, Swindon Magistrates' Court was told.
> On finding himself "stuck", Kelman called the police for help and was arrested for burglary. He admitted the charge and was fined 420, ordered to pay 11.92 in compensation, and 55 court costs.


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## Doc (24/5/05)

Just plain dumbass action.

*Jedi fans petrol inferno * 

By JOHN TROUP and ANDY RUDD 

TWO Star Wars fans suffered horrific burns in a mock battle with home-made lightsabers filled with PETROL. 

Shelley Mandiville, 17, and Mark Webb, 20, made the weapons with fluorescent light tubes. 

They filled them with fuel and washing-up liquid to act out a Jedi Knight fight scene from new movie Revenge Of The Sith. 

They lit the liquid to illuminate the makeshift toys. 

But it exploded covering them both in the burning mixture. Firefighters discovered Shelly and Mark with serious burns after being called to woodland near Hemel Hempstead, Herts, on Sunday 

Police were studying a video camera found at the scene. It was thought that a third person was taping the duel who fled in terror when the disaster happened. 

A local who visited the scene said: You could see two fluorescent light tubes on the ground next to a badly burned area of ground. 

Police said the plan was probably to film what happened and submit it to one of these Jackass-style TV shows or put it on the internet. 

Police were waiting to interview Shelley and Mark, who were both in a critical condition in hospital last night.


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## Doc (11/6/05)

Remember they guy in Oz that got DUI on his horse. This guy does it on his lawn mower :lol:

Beers,
Doc

*One Bourbon, One Lawn Mower, And 12 Beers *

Sloshed Virginia man busted driving his Turf Trac to 7-Eleven 
JUNE 10--Meet Jerry Hawkins. The 43-year-old Virginia man is facing a drunk driving rap after blowing a whopping .32 on a police Breathalyzer test. While that's nothing special, as noted in the below Culpeper Police Department report, Hawkins was pulled over as he tooled down Main Street astride a red riding mower. Hawkins, who reeked of booze, explained to cops that he was headed to the 7-Eleven for gasoline.


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## Duff (15/6/05)

Yeah baby :lol: :lol: 

View attachment ExplainThis.wmv


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## Doc (7/8/05)

Dumbass.

Doc

*Too Drunk to Find Your Car? Just Ask The Cops*

London - Picture the scene: after some heavy drinking, John Nicholas-Latch is too befuddled to find his car. Then, an idea comes - flag down the police and ask them to help find it.

The 61-year-old Briton was banned for driving for two years on Friday after a court in Kings Lynn, eastern England, heard that he did indeed stop police and ask them for assistance, ignoring their entreaties not to drive.

Nicholas-Latch, who admitted drink driving on July 1, was also ordered to undertake community service and pay legal costs.

The court heard that he had almost three times the legal limit of alcohol in his blood when he was stopped while driving.


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## Doc (16/9/05)

And the dumbass of the day goes to ...... Eriko Kawaguchi

Doc

*Woman complains to cops after hitman she hired fails to get the job done*

A woman who hired a hitman to murder the wife of her lover, and then complained to police when he didn't do the job, has been arrested along with the hitman, police said.

The murderous intentions of Eriko Kawaguchi, a Tokyo Fire Fighting Department employee, came to light after she complained to police because the hitman didn't carry out the job, although she paid him about 15 million yen.

"I came to know that the wife gave birth and then I felt betrayed (by the lover)," officers quoted Kawaguchi, 32, as saying about her motive for hiring the hitman.

Kawaguchi, from the Tokyo suburb of Tama, phoned Takaharu Tabe, 40, from Kunitachi, after she read Tabe's web page on the Internet in November last year, police said.

In January this year, Kawaguchi met Tabe in Tachikawa, requesting that he murder the wife of her lover.

In due course she paid him a total of some 15 million yen for the murder and the costs of tailing and keeping watch on the target.

Tabe offered to murder the target by taking her on a motorbike into a tunnel and pouring poisonous bacteria over her.

Tabe then showed photos of the home and working place of the woman to Kawaguchi.

He even gave white powder to Kawaguchi and said he used it to murder the 32-year-old target.

But the wife of Kawaguchi's lover was never attacked and recently gave birth.

Six months later, Kawaguchi then went to the Tama Chuo Police Station and made a complaint, police said. Officers are grilling Tabe about the possibility of other murder contracts. (Mainichi)


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## Doc (2/12/05)

*DUMBASS*

*Argument Over Beer, Spaghetti Leads To AK-47 Shooting*

ORLANDO, Fla. -- An Orange County man is in jail, accused of trying to shoot his roommate with an AK-47. Their fight started after an argument over a beer and a plate of spaghetti.

*Investigators say David Fung-Cap just wanted a beer.*

Police display the AK-47 used in the shooting. 

"A beer. A beer. You know what, he was like, you didn't get me my beer. I was like, what are you talking about?" explained roommate Terah Mills.

Mills wanted some of Fung-Cap's spaghetti, and when neither would help the other, things got ugly. Fung-Cap went for his AK-47 and opened fire.

"Four times he shot at me. If it's my time to go, it's my time to go," Mills said.

Mills told Channel 9 he managed to wrestle the assault weapon away from his crazed roommate and left the apartment to get help from sheriff's deputies, who were already arriving. But then Mills accidentally fired another shot. The deputies thought he was aiming at them.

No one can explain how, out of the five high-powered rounds fired in a densely populated apartment complex, not one person was hurt.

"I want my grandparents and parents to know that I love them and I would like a shirt and a cigarette and some shoes please," Fung-Cap said while being taken into custody.

Investigators determined Mills was the victim. Now he'll keep the apartment, the beer and the food and, in the future, he said, he'll choose his roommates more carefully.

"This guy's 25 years old. He's a grown man, just like me," Mills said.

Deputies said there was nothing illegal about the AK-47, except for the fact that it was fired. Now it's the property of the Orange County Sheriff's Office.


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## Snow (2/12/05)

Didn't get his beer...and then tried to steal his spaghetti? I reckon I would have pulled out my AK47 and tried to shoot him, too. :lol: 

ahhh....the right to bear arms... :unsure: 

- Snow


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## Kramer (2/12/05)

Dumb Cop:

From Here


VICTORIAN police will issue a parking ticket to a speed camera operator who allegedly broke the law while booking speeding motorists.
Police Chief Commissioner Christine Nixon today confirmed a Tenix Solutions camera operator would be booked after allegedly parking his camera car illegally for several hours in a suburban bus stop.

"We will in fact issue a parking ticket with the operator and he will be dealt with by his own organisation," Commissioner Nixon said today.

"I think he made an inappropriate decision, and some of us do on occasions."

Commissioner Nixon said speed cameras were used appropriately and properly "for the vast majority of times" but when mistakes were made they were admitted.

She seized on the case to reiterate a public service message, urging motorists to refrain from speeding over the holiday period.

Advertisement:
"As we get close to Christmas, people should remember not to drink and drive, not to speed and if you are going to travel long distances, don't get fatigued," she said.

Victoria's road toll stands at 318, one fewer than at the same time last year, Commissioner Nixon said.

"We're actually one under last year's total and we are doing better than we were earlier in the year.

"We'd like to see people make it back to Christmas, make it back to their lives and jobs after it and be safe on the roads."

Transport Minister Peter Batchelor said camera operators had to obey the law themselves and the Tenix Solutions operator had made a "bad choice".

The incident is the latest in a series of embarrassing setbacks for the state's speed camera system.

Last month, a Tenix Solutions camera operator who wrongly booked 41 Melbourne motorists for speeding was sacked after he mistakenly set his speed camera to 70km/h in an 80kmh zone on a suburban road in Melbourne's north-west.

In August, more than 100 drivers had fines refunded after they were caught on an incorrectly set speed camera on the Hume Highway at Somerton, in Melbourne's north.


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## Samwise Gamgee (2/12/05)

> Deputies said there was nothing illegal about the AK-47, except for the fact that it was fired. Now it's the property of the Orange County Sheriff's Office.



nothing illegal about an AK-47 :blink: :huh:


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## RobW (2/12/05)

Not much that's illegal over there. I saw the episode of Mythbusters where they went to the local gun shop & got a 50 cal rifle over the counter. Shells the size of a small rocket.


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## muga (2/12/05)

Gun laws in America are way to easy.
Gun laws in Australia are way to hard.

It seems there is no middle ground..


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## Snow (2/12/05)

settle, guys....... h34r:


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## altstart (2/12/05)

:beer: 
Thats right its the stupid F--k behind the trigger every time.
Cheers Altstart


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## Doc (9/12/05)

*H.S. Senior Arrested On Campus With Beer, Weapons*
POSTED: 9:06 am MST December 6, 2005

ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. -- A Cibola High School senior was arrested Monday while he was trying to get onto campus with a load of weapons and beer.

Albuquerque police told Action 7 News that a security guard tried to stop the teenager as he attempted to drive into the junior parking lot.

The teenager became aggresive, police said, and the security guard called city police for backup.

When officers searched the student's car they said they found two 12-gauge shotguns, a knife and three cases of beer.

School officials said the student is now on a 10-day suspension pending an expulsion hearing.

The student's name has not been made public. Charges are pending in the case


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## Samwise Gamgee (9/12/05)

Thank god they suspended him while they try to decide whether to expel him :blink:


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## Doc (28/4/06)

*Drunk Russian Paratrooper Breaks 24 Bottles Over His Head and Falls Asleep*

At his birthday party, a paratrooper from St. Petersburg, fresh home from his 2 years of military service, broke 24 bottles against his head before sinking to the floor in a drunken stupor.

The young man had served in the Russian Air Force, considered the army elite, the Moskovsky Komsomolets daily said Wednesday. He was having a birthday party with friends, when one of the guests asked whether he thought he could break a brick over his head.

The young man, annoyed by the doubt thrown on his abilities, made a bet for a box of vodka that he could, before setting off to look for a brick. However, finding no there were bricks in his apartment, he went for the next best thing empty beer bottles. 

He was breaking the 24th bottle, much to the delight of the guests, when he suddenly fell to the floor unconscious. The guests, afraid that he had killed himself, left the apartment, leaving the unconscious paratrooper on the floor where he was discovered the next morning by his parents.

The parents took the young man to hospital, where doctors said he was deep in a drunken sleep. Apart from alcoholic intoxication, the doctors found a number of bruises to the head and a concussion.

When the man regained consciousness, he refused to stay in hospital for further treatment and left as soon as he could.


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## Linz (28/4/06)

Dont blame him...if the Hospital food here is rank....what's like in Russia??? I'd leg it too, as soon as I was able to..


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## Piste (29/4/06)

Years ago while on call as a negotiator I was called to an incident in Pentridge, a villain decided to hold a knife to his throat and wouldn't let anyone in the cell.
I talked with him and persuaded him to throw out the knife, he was about to then suddenly in a fit of activity he grabbed all his cell furniture and wedged it between the cell door and the wall, he then threw out the knife and invited the uniformed officers to try to get him now.
The Officers then unlocked the cell door which opened outwards......................

Another one from a few years ago I heard on the news, probably not stupidity but funny.
A man stopped his car at a red traffic light, it was a warm day and the windows were down, passing villain ran up, reached in the passenger side window and ran off with a cloth bag on the front seat.
Police are appealling to the thief not to open the bag that belonged to the snake catcher on his way back from a job.


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## RobW (30/4/06)

"villain decided to hold a knife to his throat "

Shades of Blazing Saddles - "Nobody move or I'll shoot the niggah!"

:lol:


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## peas_and_corn (30/4/06)

Doc said:


> *H.S. Senior Arrested On Campus With Beer, Weapons*
> POSTED: 9:06 am MST December 6, 2005
> 
> ALBUQUERQUE, N.M. -- A Cibola High School senior was arrested Monday while he was trying to get onto campus with a load of weapons and beer.
> ...




I think the suspension was because he tried to drink beer not bought at the campus bar


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## Doc (14/6/06)

Full story here.



> *A MAN driving a car with the licence plate "THC4ME" has been caught with 1kg of cannabis and more than $12,000 cash in a remote Northern Territory community.*
> Michael John Page, 44, pleaded guilty in the NT Supreme Court yesterday to supplying a commercial quantity of cannabis and possessing $12,880, gained through the commission of an offence.
> 
> Prosecutor Corinna Baohm said the man bought a $4000 car, clip-seal bags and about 1kg of cannabis - for which he paid about $8800 - in Katherine in January. He then drove to Ramingining on the Arnhem Land coast where he stayed with a friend.



Dumbass. 

Doc


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