# Stag Semen Stout



## earle (12/8/15)

http://www.stuff.co.nz/life-style/food-wine/drinks/70801726/a-semenil-pint-wellington-pub-and-brewer-create-beer-laced-with-stag-semen

Whaaaaat?



Best quote from the article though:


> "There's only one way to serve semen stout and that's handpulling it."


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## warra48 (12/8/15)

Well, we now know Katie and Elvy do swallow.........


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## Dave70 (12/8/15)

Senator Corey Bernardi would describe this the thin edge of the wedge I suspect.


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## jyo (12/8/15)

I hope the price per pint isn't too deer.


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## Ducatiboy stu (12/8/15)

Dave70 said:


> Senator Corey Bernardi would describe this the thin edge of the wedge I suspect.


I would love to give him a pint of it and tell him after the fact :lol:


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## earle (12/8/15)

Ducatiboy stu said:


> I would love to give him a pint of it and tell him after the fact :lol:


He could use it wash down some prairie oysters


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## Dave70 (12/8/15)

Pale ale next?


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## Weizguy (12/8/15)

This is next-level above stirring a beer with your knob, innit?

Wondering what makes stag jizz into export-quality?


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## Ducatiboy stu (12/8/15)

I want to know who the person is that has to collect the semen


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## Weizguy (12/8/15)

Ducatiboy stu said:


> I want to know who the person is that has to collect the semen


Probably knock out the stag and collect via electro-ejaculation, like they do with possums.

I bet it's not all from the one beast, but blended Stag ejac, like a blended whisky, only thicker and saltier.


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## Ducatiboy stu (12/8/15)

I actually knew a bloke that on his business card he had " Bull Puller" 

He used to make shit load collecting semen from champion bulls

Funny man to


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## earle (12/8/15)

There was some footage on TV in the last week, maybe on The Weekly, of collecting semen from one of the remaining white rhino's. All very manual, the bloke was obviously well practiced but I'm not sure if the rhino had a smile or not.


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## Dave70 (12/8/15)

Ducatiboy stu said:


> I want to know who the person is that has to collect the semen


Be a wanker for sure.


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## michaeld16 (12/8/15)

Les the Weizguy said:


> Probably knock out the stag and collect via electro-ejaculation, like they do with possums.
> 
> I bet it's not all from the one beast, but blended Stag ejac, like a blended whisky, only thicker and saltier.


you sound well versed in jacking stag and possums there mate


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## Ducatiboy stu (12/8/15)

Beastiality is illegal in most countries

Bernardi would be have kittens over it


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## Weizguy (12/8/15)

michaeld16 said:


> you sound well versed in jacking stag and possums there mate


Where I attended University in Newcastle, they had quite a possum study program, but I never participated. A photo of the device in question, which looked like a small electric cattle prod, was included in a Biology Society annual magazine (with a comment about being available for party hire)

Have also seen it on television, you understand.


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## earle (12/8/15)

Ducatiboy stu said:


> Beastiality is illegal in most countries
> 
> Bernardi would be have kittens over it


The kittens will come in handy as I've heard that his airlock is not bubbling.


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## Ducatiboy stu (12/8/15)

Somehow I dont see Bernardi as a home brewer...

Fuckwit yes, Brewer no


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## michaeld16 (12/8/15)

Les the Weizguy said:


> . A photo of the device in question, which looked like a small electric cattle prod, was included in a Biology Society annual magazine (with a comment about being available for party hire)
> 
> Have also seen it on television, you understand.


this may be how my wife managed to get pregnant


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## Ducatiboy stu (12/8/15)

You do realise where the put the electro stimulator..... :lol:


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## spog (12/8/15)

Les the Weizguy said:


> Where I attended University in Newcastle, they had quite a possum study program, but I never participated. A photo of the device in question, which looked like a small electric cattle prod, was included in a Biology Society annual magazine (with a comment about being available for party hire)
> 
> Have also seen it on television, you understand.


back when i was an apprentice I got an electric shock at work,later that night I went into shock,now I didn't get a chubby or starch the sheets but in the morning I was certainly fucked.
And that small electric cattle prod would have to be very small to stimulate a Possum,otherwise you would end up with a smouldering pile of fur......and I am not taking the devious suggestions any further.


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## Lincoln2 (12/8/15)

I'm quite tolerant but:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=acQ072Ep90A


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## fraser_john (13/8/15)

"In 2011 its apple-infused horse semen shots proved popular with women, while 2013 saw syringes of stag semenon offer."

Someone has to say it ..... but if you get any on their hair or face, you never hear the end of it.


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## Ducatiboy stu (13/8/15)

Must say...I wont be trying it ... EVER


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## Grott (13/8/15)

Did Stephen Dank collect and import this semen?


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## Weizguy (13/8/15)

spog said:


> back when i was an apprentice I got an electric shock at work,later that night I went into shock,now I didn't get a chubby or starch the sheets but in the morning I was certainly fucked.
> And that small electric cattle prod would have to be very small to stimulate a Possum,otherwise you would end up with a smouldering pile of fur......and I am not taking the devious suggestions any further.


More of a 'magic wand" than a cattle prod in size.
Rectally inserted/ prostate propelled.


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## michaeld16 (13/8/15)

Ducatiboy stu said:


> You do realise where the put the electro stimulator..... :lol:


the heat of the moment and um... never mind


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## Spohaw (13/8/15)

ffs ...... whos drinking this ?

I wouldn't have the balls to drink any of that shit ....

I hear Rocky mountain oysters are ok .... but ive never been drunk enough to try them

......wonder if any women would drink a stout a human has jizzed in ? or is that just gross?


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## earle (13/8/15)

In reality, I suspect if added to the boil not much would get through to the finished product. All cells would be ruptured in the boil, any sugars would end up converted by yeast and proteins might end up in the break. Not that I'm going to try making one but wondering if its just really marketing gimmick.

Apple infused horse semen and syringes of the stuff - that's another thing - who on earth is sitting around thinking - hmmmm this would be a good idea????


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## sponge (13/8/15)

Probably the same fella that milked the first cow h34r:


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## earle (13/8/15)

sponge said:


> Probably the same fella that milked the first bull h34r:


Fixed for you


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## Tex N Oz (13/8/15)

This is just gimmicky crap at best.... The whole "infused" beer thing is over the top and getting old.
If you want some shit like a pizza infused beer, just go get a pizza and have a beer.... or suck a buck and have a beer... your business.
I'm getting the gist that the whole craft beer industry is run by a bunch of f'ed up hipsters.


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## Sippa (13/8/15)

Wtf? who would even think that it might be tasty to put some buck spunk in your beers? they be smoking some whacky tabacky or they just cant brew nice beers so they brew this slop!


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## Droopy Brew (13/8/15)

There are better ways to get a creamy head on a beer- of that Im certain.


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## TheBigD (13/8/15)

I liked the comment "it needed a cheap adjunked and you can get it under a buck"


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## Spohaw (13/8/15)

I know people who have smoked cannabis and they said they have never thought about drinking jizz before

hahah edited !


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## Ducatiboy stu (13/8/15)

Spohaw said:


> ......wonder if any women would drink a stout a human has jizzed in ? or is that just gross?


Well I know a few women that like stout and dont mind swa...... oh never mind


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## fletcher (13/8/15)

if i saw it at a bar, i'd give it a try. i don't really care. might taste nice. 

people eat and drink some of the most hideous things and enjoy them; and still live.

the only thing stopping people is fear, but i do agree that it's very gimmicky.


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## Tex N Oz (13/8/15)

fletcher said:


> the only thing stopping people is fear, but i do agree that it's very gimmicky.


Fear?? It's not fear mate. Not like you're sucking it out of a mad buck. (however, it probably wasn't happy to have some hipster tuggin on his totem) 
What's stopping people is disgust and the general principle that perhaps it's not "rad, grovey, cool, or fully fuckin sick" to think someone has molested a beast to obtain and put in your beverage something that is acceptably amongst the normal human "Not foodstuff". What's next? A dirty nappy? Menstrual blood? A cup of shit? or did we just jump over all of that and decide to put in animal sperm instead because it's ground-breaking and edgy..... I can't say who will fall for that marketing but it won't be me. Actually I'll be looking at every bottle I buy to ensure it doesn't say "Choice Bros Brewery". 
I can just imagine I'm not in the minority either.


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## fletcher (13/8/15)

Tex N Oz said:


> Fear?? It's not fear mate. Not like you're sucking it out of a mad buck. (however, it probably wasn't happy to have some hipster tuggin on his totem)
> What's stopping people is disgust and the general principle that perhaps it's not "rad, grovey, cool, or fully fuckin sick" to think someone has molested a beast to obtain and put in your beverage something that is acceptably amongst the normal human "Not foodstuff". What's next? A dirty nappy? Menstrual blood? A cup of shit? or did we just jump over all of that and decide to put in animal sperm instead because it's ground-breaking and edgy..... I can't say who will fall for that marketing but it won't be me. Actually I'll be looking at every bottle I buy to ensure it doesn't say "Choice Bros Brewery".
> I can just imagine I'm not in the minority either.


what's the difference between jizz and say, brains or embryos or feet or testicles?

they're all parts of animals people eat, the world over.


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## sponge (13/8/15)

It probably washes down nicely after a duck embryo and tuna eye.


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## Spohaw (13/8/15)

I'll got some IPA I can jizz in and send to you if you would like to try it fletcher haha

Probably won't kill you 

( that's a joke btw , ain't going to jizz in a perfectly good beer and ruin it .... Might taste good but I'm not willing to risk it ) 

And stu ..... Haha like tex said they should just have a stout and sw..... Oh never mind


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## Tex N Oz (13/8/15)

sponge said:


> It probably washes down nicely after a duck embryo and tuna eye.


Oh Sponge!! Don't tell me you'd be in line at the bar for some deer spunk too?

We might have to change your signature to:

The mouth of a perfectly happy man is filled with deer. :icon_drool2: 

:lol: BWAAHAHAHA!!! :lol:


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## Tex N Oz (13/8/15)

fletcher said:


> what's the difference between jizz and say, brains or embryos or feet or testicles?
> 
> they're all parts of animals people eat, the world over.


I dunno.. perhaps because they have significant nutritional value and one didn't have to rub off an animal to get it?
And no.. calf fries and mountain oysters all come from immature animals.
Of course there are cultures that eat human embryos and pickled rhino balls or tiger paws, but I'll stand clear of that sub-class.


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## fletcher (14/8/15)

Tex N Oz said:


> I dunno.. perhaps because they have significant nutritional value and one didn't have to rub off an animal to get it?
> And no.. calf fries and mountain oysters all come from immature animals.
> Of course there are cultures that eat human embryos and pickled rhino balls or tiger paws, but I'll stand clear of that sub-class.


sub-class? that's a bit elitist of you there is it not?


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## Tex N Oz (14/8/15)

So be it. I'll gladly put myself on a rung above those who eat human remains and endangered animal products.


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## fletcher (14/8/15)

Tex N Oz said:


> So be it. I'll gladly put myself on a rung above those who eat human remains and endangered animal products.


since when were they endangered? if you're going that far, why not stop eating meat altogether?

my point being, have an opinion, sure, just don't consider yourself above other peoples' taste preferences. you're not right or wrong, but neither are they.


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## Ducatiboy stu (14/8/15)

I dont think I could come at drinking a stout with semen in it


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## Mardoo (14/8/15)

How about drinking a stout with seamen?


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## sponge (14/8/15)

Ducatiboy stu said:


> I dont think I could come at drinking a stout with semen in it


I see what you did there..


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## sponge (14/8/15)

Tex N Oz said:


> Oh Sponge!! Don't tell me you'd be in line at the bar for some deer spunk too?
> 
> We might have to change your signature to:
> 
> ...


I'm more than happy to try most things once. Definitely made for an enjoyable time during my travels in Asia.


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## Tex N Oz (14/8/15)

fletcher said:


> since when were they endangered? if you're going that far, why not stop eating meat altogether?
> 
> my point being, have an opinion, sure, just don't consider yourself above other peoples' taste preferences. you're not right or wrong, but neither are they.


Tigers - 1970
Rhinos - 1977

Because I love a medium-rare rib-eye.

And I will always, without compromise, consider myself a greater human for not eating human flesh and/or endangered animals.
Modern feel-good philosophy might not agree, but that's ok with me..

However, this has nothing to do with the topic "at hand"..


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## Ducatiboy stu (14/8/15)

Click if you dare...

http://cookingwithcum.com/


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## sponge (14/8/15)

Ducatiboy stu said:


> Click if you dare...
> 
> http://cookingwithcum.com/


"Hosted by your friendly, neighborhood chef, Stu!"


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## Ducatiboy stu (14/8/15)

Its always good to know that the main ingredient is available in most bars, restaurants and households....and probably supermarkets as well h34r:


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## Tex N Oz (14/8/15)

Ducatiboy stu said:


> Click if you dare...
> 
> http://cookingwithcum.com/


Who the hell wouldn't click it just to say they did? 
That's a whole new level of wrong..
"ingredients available behind most bars" most = unless all female staff and then they might be able to "work it out"....


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## yankinoz (14/8/15)

What's next for that brewery, Mr. Hankey Saison? I'll pass.


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## Spohaw (14/8/15)

That a site you have bookmarked Stu or ??

Haha I'll have to click later haha ..... Be a great ingredient when times are tough haha


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## Ducatiboy stu (14/8/15)

Reminds me of a mate who used to say " You know your poor when you have to masturbate to give the cat a saucer of milk "


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## Ducatiboy stu (14/8/15)

yankinoz said:


> What's next for that brewery, Mr. Hankey Saison? I'll pass.


 :lol:


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## sponge (14/8/15)

yankinoz said:


> What's next for that brewery, Mr. Hankey Saison? I'll pass.


I think a brown porter would be more suitable..


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## Spohaw (14/8/15)

That's funny stu haha


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## Spohaw (14/8/15)

Flanders bruin or maybe an abbey style for a mr hanky beer


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## Ducatiboy stu (14/8/15)

yeah, I dunno... I still think it would taste like shit


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## Spohaw (14/8/15)

Would get you shit faced I reckon


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## Ducatiboy stu (14/8/15)

Adds new meaning to getting shitfaced on the piss


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