# Classic AHB threads



## GrumpyPaul (7/9/16)

After spending the arvo reliving the good old days reading some of the links to classic AHB threads I thought "We need a Classic AHB Threads thread"

Got a favorite thread?

Post a link and let everyone have a good read of how much fun AHB has been at times.

One of my faves was QLDKev's Custom Clocks thread


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## mtb (7/9/16)

Being a relative latecomer in AHB I can definitely appreciate old "historically significant" threads like these.

All over an effing clock.. wow


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## Ducatiboy stu (7/9/16)

GrumpyPaul said:


> One of my faves was QLDKev's Custom Clocks thread


Your terrible Muriel


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## Camo6 (7/9/16)

Searching for any thread that contains the name 'Yasmani' usually brings as much pisshab as the original.
I recall a funny thread where someone tried selling some Italian leather shoes but can't seem to find it.


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## TheWiggman (7/9/16)

Best thread I've come across - Fully Automated Brewing System
Somewhere, Bandito actually exists and I pray for the day he returns with his first glass of amber nectar. Did he sell the gear? Did he set fire to his home in comical fashion? On making the final tweak to one of his $600 Teflon butterfly valves, did he lose a finger and give up entirely? Like Jesus, I pray for his return but like Jesus, I feel I will only keep praying.


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## petesbrew (7/9/16)

I wouldn't know where to begin looking, but there was one guy who intended on brewing a knk in one of those 1000L rainwater tanks.
He had it all worked out - many dozens of cans, a shitload of sugar, f##kloads of yeast, and filled with the garden tap.


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## WarmerBeer (7/9/16)

And thus, a legend was born:

Kittens. Airlocks. Butters.

The fun really starts at post #10


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## Blind Dog (7/9/16)

Call me old fashioned, but I kind of like the threads where someone asks a question and gets thoughtful, informative responses with maybe the odd witticism thrown in for good measure. Boring, I know.

Although I still hope to uncover the secret trove that includes the thread(s) that ended with The Great Purge


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## Ducatiboy stu (8/9/16)

Blind Dog said:


> Although I still hope to uncover the secret trove that includes the thread(s) that ended with *The Great Purge*


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## kerrplease (8/9/16)

my friends father use to say if there is a bottle caper tool their is just about anything i like then.the rest is easy he use to lay brikes his best day was up to 1000 brikes a day some times .so beer was not even a problem at all a 100 bottles of home brew was low we would just make more.this went on still to this day brike laying and making home brew.then they all use to get together as one happy family and talk about the old days in frount of the fire place he built of course and his new property house to.


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## Camo6 (8/9/16)

And with that, another classic thread was born.


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## GrumpyPaul (8/9/16)

Classic AHB Classic Kerr


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## WarmerBeer (8/9/16)

Ducatiboy stu said:


>


Lightweight


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## Dave70 (8/9/16)

kerrplease said:


> my friends father use to say if there is a bottle caper tool their is just about anything i like then.the rest is easy he use to lay brikes his best day was up to 1000 brikes a day some times .so beer was not even a problem at all a 100 bottles of home brew was low we would just make more.this went on still to this day brike laying and making home brew.then they all use to get together as one happy family and talk about the old days in frount of the fire place he built of course and his new property house to.


Kerr, you are to the word salad what Iron Chef Sakai is to French / Japanese fusion cuisine. Its a gift.


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## warra48 (8/9/16)

This one gets a vote from me.

http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/47757-graphic-designers-i-need-a-logo/


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## Lord Raja Goomba I (8/9/16)

Need Chappo.


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## Lord Raja Goomba I (8/9/16)

Black Duck reminded me of the Chinese Hop buy. That was still a sore point when I joined.


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## Dave70 (8/9/16)

Never mind trolling or asking about distillation. Back in 2006 even asking about cold conditioning would see a thread locked. 

http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/9834-cold-conditoning/


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## warra48 (8/9/16)

Dave70 said:


> Never mind trolling or asking about distillation. Back in 2006 even asking about cold conditioning would see a thread locked.
> 
> http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/9834-cold-conditoning/


Difficult to understand why something as innocuous as that was locked.


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## S.E (8/9/16)

warra48 said:


> Difficult to understand why something as innocuous as that was locked.


Surely there was more to it than those two harmless posts? As a mod can’t you see any hidden posts?


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## Ducatiboy stu (8/9/16)

WarmerBeer said:


> Lightweight


Dont worry, I got Jail time out of it


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## warra48 (8/9/16)

S.E said:


> Surely there was more to it than those two harmless posts? As a mod can’t you see any hidden posts?


In the words of Peggy Lee, "Is that all there is?

Yes, that's it folks, just the two posts, nothing hidden.


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## LAGERFRENZY (8/9/16)

Ducatiboy stu said:


> Dont worry, I got Jail time out of it


I hope you didn't try to bend down to pick up the soap in the showers


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## WarmerBeer (8/9/16)

warra48 said:


> In the words of Peggy Lee, "Is that all there is?
> 
> Yes, that's it folks, just the two posts, nothing hidden.


Maybe you could unlock it?

Pretty sure there's been additional research and insight into cold-conditioning in the ensuing 10.5 years.


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## sp0rk (8/9/16)

Suprised the yeast rehydration thread hasn't been linked yet...


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## Batz (8/9/16)

Long way back but it was fun at the time.

http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/4820-simple-alternative-to-false-bottom-for-mash/?hl=gravel

Batz


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## pcqypcqy (8/9/16)

GrumpyPaul said:


> After spending the arvo reliving the good old days reading some of the links to classic AHB threads I thought "We need a Classic AHB Threads thread"
> 
> Got a favorite thread?
> 
> ...


I missed it at the time and have just read all 7 pages. Wow. Just wow.


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## mofox1 (8/9/16)

Batz said:


> Long way back but it was fun at the time.
> 
> http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/4820-simple-alternative-to-false-bottom-for-mash/?hl=gravel
> 
> Batz


We didn't hear back about the gravel - must be a secret he's keeping to himself.


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## mikec (8/9/16)

Batz said:


> Long way back but it was fun at the time.
> 
> http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/4820-simple-alternative-to-false-bottom-for-mash/?hl=gravel
> 
> Batz


So what happened? He didn't report back! Gravel Rash Ale has a certain ring to it.


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## mofox1 (8/9/16)

Okay - I DAFS, and wow... so it is a real thing after all:
http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/26225-120l-mash-on-weekend/

and
http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/21459-photo-tour-of-our-big-brew-day/


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## Ducatiboy stu (8/9/16)

sp0rk said:


> Suprised the yeast rehydration thread hasn't been linked yet...


Oh dear God...noooo


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## bradsbrew (8/9/16)

sp0rk said:


> Suprised the yeast rehydration thread hasn't been linked yet...


Which one?


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## Dave70 (8/9/16)

sp0rk said:


> Suprised the yeast rehydration thread hasn't been linked yet...


The immersion chiller and optimum water flow rate thread also had some of the more (and less) fluid / thermodynamic literate on the board sorely needing of their own chilling system. 
Many a bat and ball was taken home from that one I believe.


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## pcmfisher (8/9/16)

Any thread that speedie had anything to say in was good value.

What a wealth of knowledge he was.


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## sp0rk (8/9/16)

Yasmani
http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/60070-new-times-brewer/


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## Ducatiboy stu (8/9/16)

I miss nazjam and his tpying


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## bradsbrew (8/9/16)

The Tale of Townsville was a crack up. http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/41025-the-tale-of-townsville/


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## warra48 (8/9/16)

WarmerBeer said:


> Maybe you could unlock it?
> 
> Pretty sure there's been additional research and insight into cold-conditioning in the ensuing 10.5 years.


OK, see for yourself, just the two posts.


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## Ducatiboy stu (8/9/16)

Anyway...cold conditioning will never take off....neither will no-chill


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## WarmerBeer (8/9/16)

Ducatiboy stu said:


> Anyway...cold conditioning will never take off....neither will no-chill


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## mosto (8/9/16)

sp0rk said:


> Suprised the yeast rehydration thread hasn't been linked yet...


Likewise, still one of my favourites (sorry Stu)!

http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/74450-re-hydrate-v-not/


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## Ducatiboy stu (8/9/16)

mosto said:


> Likewise, still one of my favourites (sorry Stu)!
> 
> http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/74450-re-hydrate-v-not/


Yes... I like it to.....I still dont think anyone twigged yet


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## sp0rk (8/9/16)

The funny thing is, Fermentis now recommend to hydrate in either wort or water


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## Ducatiboy stu (8/9/16)

sp0rk said:


> The funny thing is, Fermentis now recommend to hydrate in either wort or water


What would they know.....they must log onto AHB


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## Batz (8/9/16)

bradsbrew said:


> The Tale of Townsville was a crack up. http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/41025-the-tale-of-townsville/


Funny times. :lol:


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## kerrplease (9/9/16)

https://www.google.com.au/url?sa=t&rct=j&q=&esrc=s&source=web&cd=3&cad=rja&uact=8&ved=0ahUKEwjmq56x9oDPAhVHW5QKHUBoAQUQFggpMAI&url=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.austlii.edu.au%2Fau%2Flegis%2Fvic%2Fconsol_act%2Faca1985204%2Fsch3b.html&usg=AFQjCNGlSjUCZitOx-qu5f5JGEyj7F31CQ&sig2=1tgkqm6FrWppCemq3K8SqQ


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## sp0rk (9/9/16)

Well, that's a bit of a downer


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## kerrplease (14/9/16)

The hops plant is the closest relative of hemp (Cannabis sp.), and the stems of the hops plant are similarly a source of fiber, though not as durable. Nevertheless, the fiber may be used to create linen (DeLyser & Kasper 1994). Indeed, Cannabis and hops are the only plants in the Cannabaceae family, and can be cross-grafted very well, but there is no translocation of cannabinoids to the hops vine when this is done (Voogelbreinder 2009, 192).


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## sp0rk (14/9/16)

Classic kerr


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## WarmerBeer (14/9/16)

Was beginning to wonder where you had disappeared to, my little toady friend.


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## Bridges (14/9/16)

How could we forget Vittorio and his kegerator...


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## Ducatiboy stu (14/9/16)

Ahhh..yes...Vittorio....


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## lmccrone (14/9/16)

Bridges said:


> How could we forget Vittorio and his kegerator...



Beat me too it, shit certainly got real for Vittorio quickly!


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## lmccrone (14/9/16)

Bridges said:


> How could we forget Vittorio and his kegerator...


http://www.aussiehomebrewer.com/index.php?/topic/74566-2-tap-kegerator-and-400lt-vessel-for-sale


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## Lecterfan (14/9/16)

Well, for what it's worth, I liked the Speedie days - 17 or 18 fermenters in an AC room cos taxi drivers need lots of piss and need to learn things enthusiastially and within a limited time frame...spot on, Butters, Chappo - guys I couldn't agree with about anything in real life I suspect, but who wanted to brew better beer and did, and offered many useful things for the internet - and then there are those we do not speak of (Bum, Nick JD etc), that I often also found myself in sympathy with in terms of actual brewing commentary, despite their shortness/intolerance/pointed-humour. I found/find Yasmini and Kerr a little vulgar for my tastes. Anyway, that's me out after a few pints of piss that doesn't taste like beer used to or some shit like that.


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## Ducatiboy stu (14/9/16)

Remember, Speedie, Bandito, Vittorio.............And bingo...we now have the WW..... Those guys where way ahead of us

I still remember those crazy times when brewers got burnt at the stake for daring the think outside the fermenter..


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## Camo6 (14/9/16)

Whatever happened to Silo Ted?


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## barls (14/9/16)

Camo6 said:


> Whatever happened to Silo Ted?


gave up brewing i think


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## Ducatiboy stu (14/9/16)

barls said:


> gave up brewing i think


So he died then


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## Lodan (14/9/16)

djar007 to Vittorio:
_did my wife somehow contact you Vittorio. She is cunning like that._

Bloody LOL! :lol:


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## lmccrone (14/9/16)

lmccrone said:


> http://www.aussiehomebrewer.com/index.php?/topic/74566-2-tap-kegerator-and-400lt-vessel-for-sale


Bugger, I just re read this thread and looks like the moderators took out almost all the spicy goodness, probably for the best actually, it got quite nasty.


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## Liam_snorkel (15/9/16)

I was pretty disgusted by the way he was treated. Knocked my opinion of some of my fellow AHBers down a few pegs that for sure.


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## Yob (15/9/16)

Liam_snorkel said:


> I was pretty disgusted by the way he was treated. Knocked my opinion of some of my fellow AHBers down a few pegs that for sure.


You know he was totally selling booze without all the checks and balances done right?

In fact didn't his brewery suspiciously burn down mid council investigation? 

I lost faith in the man after the bottle filler fiasco


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## Camo6 (15/9/16)

Yob said:


> You know he was totally selling booze without all the checks and balances done right?
> 
> In fact didn't his brewery suspiciously burn down mid council investigation?
> 
> I lost faith in the man after the bottle filler fiasco


Haha! The bottle filler thread. Classic Vittorio.


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## manticle (15/9/16)

Yob said:


> You know he was totally selling booze without all the checks and balances done right?
> In fact didn't his brewery suspiciously burn down mid council investigation?
> I lost faith in the man after the bottle filler fiasco


Irrelevant to the thread at hand. Initial sale withdrawal may have been badly handled but people not involved in the sale stepped in, sent abusive pms and engaged in internet antics that were pretty shameful.

Taken a bit far in the end.


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## Yob (15/9/16)

manticle said:


> Irrelevant to the thread at hand. Initial sale *and withdrawal may have been badly handled but people not involved in the sale stepped in, sent abusive pms and engaged in internet antics that were pretty shameful.
> 
> Taken a bit far in the end.


agreed, the whole thing was an _epic fail_ of a thread.. I suspect a lot of that thread is now hidden as well, and probably rightfully so.

Just because it was bad, doesnt mean it's not a classic, just for different reasons.


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## wynnum1 (15/9/16)

Lord Raja Goomba I said:


> Black Duck reminded me of the Chinese Hop buy. That was still a sore point when I joined.


 Chinese Hop Bulk Buy has anyone used these hops again.


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## Lord Raja Goomba I (15/9/16)

And that's where the mods earn their (nonexistent) pay cheque.

The great purge was sad, but there were some really abusive threads and lots of ignored warnings about that sort of behaviour.

AHB is sadly a lot more sanitised as a result and missing lots of good knowledge peoples- but what can you do? You're stuffed if you do and stuffed if you don't.

Back on topic - I miss the funny threads and I really value all those that thought outside the square. They got me brewing with household crap. Nick JD's stovetop thread got me going, the early no-chillers, FWH was discussed. 

But hey, don't forget we have some of that still - freezing yeast, hop discussions, continuing keezer/kegerator builds.


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## Dave70 (15/9/16)

Good lord..
All this mawkish lachrymose for the 'good old days' is giving me an ******* ulcer. AHB is the still the preeminent home brewing resource of the Australian internet. Scientific fact.


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## Batz (15/9/16)

Dave70 said:


> Good lord..
> All this mawkish lachrymose for the 'good old days' is giving me an ******* ulcer. AHB is the still the preeminent home brewing resource of the Australian internet. Scientific fact.


There's been a lot of fun and tears along the way though 

I wish I could remember the guy years ago who wanted to grow and malt his own grain, make his own yeast?, as well as a multitude of other DYI stuff. Turned into a fun thread.


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## TheWiggman (15/9/16)

http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/37472-the-great-chinese-hop-buy-2009/ - Chinese hop bulk buy, I couldn't look away 
Actually on reflection, any thread where Darren posted quickly turns divisive and discordant.

http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/73089-how-do-i-improve-aussiehomebrewer/
The one that ended it for Nick JD, some pretty robust discussion in there however.

Camo6 I thought I was Silo Ted's reincarnation?


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## Lord Raja Goomba I (15/9/16)

The 2nd thread makes for good reading.

Reminds me of the bad old days.


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## wynnum1 (15/9/16)

I blame the gun laws for so many drunk angry people on the Internet if they had _automatic_ _handgun_s they could get out and play with them when drunk in the United States you can even buy _Tannerite_.


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## lmccrone (15/9/16)

Camo6 said:


> Haha! The bottle filler thread. Classic Vittorio.


Can you sort us out with the link? Surely its classic Vittorio it must be a classic AHB thread


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## mtb (15/9/16)

Is it this one?
http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/76171-what-psi-level-do-you-counter-pressure-bottle-fill/


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## mtb (15/9/16)

..probably not, after giving it a read


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## sp0rk (15/9/16)

http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/77053-4-head-counter-head-filler-for-sale/


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## lmccrone (15/9/16)

sp0rk said:


> http://aussiehomebrewer.com/topic/77053-4-head-counter-head-filler-for-sa


Well that one looks like its been sanitized as well, but being a keen follower of Vittorio's antics I can let my imagination fill in the banks for me.

"Its obviously a bargain, it takes a forklift and a gang of strong men to move the thing!" Classic Vittorio


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## LAGERFRENZY (15/9/16)

Curious to know just how bad the Chinese hops were?


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## lmccrone (16/9/16)

LAGERFRENZY said:


> Curious to know just how bad the Chinese hops were?


Me too, I invested an hour and a half in that thread and I'm still none the wiser. Although the fact that I've never tasted a beer containing Marco Polo is probably a bit of s clue


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## bradsbrew (16/9/16)

I tipped out 2 full kegs, the cluster was similar to parmesan soaked in a brine of vomit.


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## spog (16/9/16)

LAGERFRENZY said:


> Curious to know just how bad the Chinese hops were?


His brewing podcast vanished some time ago as well.


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## QldKev (16/9/16)

LAGERFRENZY said:


> Curious to know just how bad the Chinese hops were?


I was not happy with the taste of them, but I threw out all of mine after seeing an oil slick on top of the kettle when brewing with them. Never seem the oil slick with normal hops prior or after. Several kg worth gone, and many cubes or wort dumped.


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## sp0rk (16/9/16)

I recall either Bribie or Tidal Pete (while drinking at Roche's in Grafton) saying they still had some??


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## eldertaco (16/9/16)

bradsbrew said:


> the cluster was similar to parmesan soaked in a brine of vomit.


So, good for a sour then? h34r:


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## bradsbrew (16/9/16)

eldertaco said:


> So, good for a sour then? h34r:


Yeah, why not.....they're infected shit anyway :lol:


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## Ducatiboy stu (16/9/16)

The problem with the Chinese hops was that the buyers had no idea about hops

The hops where fine, was just those who bought them had no idea about using hops.


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## sp0rk (16/9/16)

Says the man who is in love with PoR 
But yeah, from what I've been told by a few people now, some of the hops were ok, some were pretty shocking
I wouldn't mind having a go at another chinese bulk buy actually, there's a lot of talk about the quality of Chinese hop farms these days


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## Ducatiboy stu (16/9/16)

sp0rk said:


> Says the man who is in love with PoR
> But yeah, from what I've been told by a few people now, some of the hops were ok, some were pretty shocking
> I wouldn't mind having a go at another chinese bulk buy actually, there's a lot of talk about the quality of Chinese hop farms these days


It was in Jest :lol:

I remember reading the comments and the "seller" was blaming the brewers not the hops


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## RobW (16/9/16)

I used some of the Chinese "Saaz" and they were OK but they certainly didn't have much resemblance to traditional Czech Saaz.


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## TidalPete (16/9/16)

Splitting at Chap Chap's


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## fraser_john (16/9/16)

bradsbrew said:


> <snip> the cluster was similar to parmesan soaked in a brine of vomit.


LOL, quote worthy.

<flame suit> so you made the perfect XXXX then? </flame suit>


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## LAGERFRENZY (16/9/16)

sp0rk said:


> I wouldn't mind having a go at another chinese bulk buy actually, there's a lot of talk about the quality of Chinese hop farms these days


I was wondering the same thing until people reported about tipping kegs and cubes out.


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## bradsbrew (16/9/16)

TidalPete said:


> Splitting at Chap Chap's


Ah, the thinner, less grey version of me in that pic.


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## lmccrone (16/9/16)

Have a look at these qoutes from townsville aka "Graham L Sanders"

[SIZE=14pt]“I have done many MANY hop bulk buys”[/SIZE]

[SIZE=14pt]“They just like me and are prepared to do this small order just for me”[/SIZE]

[SIZE=14pt]“One thing I will confirm, the order would have been bigger than the last).”[/SIZE]

I put it to you that his real name was not Graham L Sanders nor was it townsville, i put it to you that he was in fact one Donald Trump!


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## Droopy Brew (16/9/16)

Or Commandant Lasaad


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## goomboogo (17/9/16)

LAGERFRENZY said:


> I was wondering the same thing until people reported about tipping kegs and cubes out.


The issue with these hops wasn't necessarily the country of origin. The organiser of the buy was dudded into buying some manky hops that no-one else wanted. These things can happen and it's the chance you take when conducting deals on the internet. I've heard that somtimes the potential Russian bride isn't really the person in the picture on the 'Russian Brides' website.

The biggest problem with the buy wasn't the substandard quality of the product but the substandard quality of the person who initiated the buy. Most people would have apologised for the quality and most people would have accepted that it was a risk they chose to take. Afterall, most people only spent a small amount of money so it wasn't the end of the world. The objections resulted from the claim made by numb-nut Sanders that all the ordinary beer made with the hops was down to brewer error.

He should have been banned after trying to distribute copyrighted software. He should have been banned after claiming he was making a fraudulent insurance claim after a cyclone. Initially, I cut him some slack because it was ovisous that he wasn't the sharpest tool in the shed. However, one night he crawled out of his hole one too many times. That night may have broke the forum's record for most deleted posts in a single night.


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## spog (17/9/16)

He came across as of bit of a knob with some of the " funny" jokes he used in his podcasts ,jokes that he laughed his arse off about.


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## jlm (17/9/16)

So.....Wasn't Yasmani just Bribie posting bullshit after he threw a tantrum, left the forum (allegedly), and never was coming back to AHB ever......


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## big78sam (27/10/16)

Porkspin was another classic. I'm not going to attempt to link the that from work


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## Ducatiboy stu (27/10/16)

big78sam said:


> Porkspin was another classic. I'm not going to attempt to link the that from work


Do it and gain yourself a few points


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## sp0rk (27/10/16)

jlm said:


> So.....Wasn't Yasmani just Bribie posting bullshit after he threw a tantrum, left the forum (allegedly), and never was coming back to AHB ever......


Yasmani was around well before Bribie left
I notice Yasmani's new account got banned


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