option 1: get a new wife
I've put too many years into training this one. Couldn't be bothered starting again
option 2: cook something nice and smelly at the same time that she likes (e.g. curry)
Mate, I'm cooking beer. I can't be expected to do everything. Geez, you're as bad as the missus.
option 3: use it as an excuse to buy some cool bling - personally I bought a 40L concealed element crown urn and it's fantasic. Probably safe from a fire point of view in a woodwork shed too.
Looks like this is the way to go. Sheds big enough to dedicate an area to brewing, it's always (well mostly always) kept clean, it has a good dust extraction system and is well ventilated.
option 4: give up home brewing...