Continuing Rant Thread - Get it Off Ya Chest here

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warra48 said:
No, there are indeed plenty of placebos in the banking industry. They're called the lies about customer service and the value they place on customers. Plenty of crap they publish, but none of it works, and they don't mean it. The bottom line is the upper echelon of management and their so called "performance" bonuses. Then again, that applies to almost all big business.
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I'm 100% with you there. I just work for them... I don't have to like them.

With the daily rate I charge them it gives me a chance to get my own back and let them feel what its like to be milked for every cent...
 
On a job site today and was given a mobile scaffold to use,I asked for the missing safety rails etc and was told I don't need them!
The dumb prick who told me this was on the same OH&S course as I was and 6 months ago was pinged for using unsafe scaffold on another site ( read dumb Cnut ).
I again told him it wasn't upto standard and he then asked what is wrong with it,by this time I am wondering if he has anything between his ears apart from wax.
I then said I have a problem with his mother, he asked why,I said.....she should have swallowed you,you useless waste of ******* space.
**** me, that peanut is a marvel at how shit can be stuffed into a skin and called a person.
 
spog said:
On a job site today and was given a mobile scaffold to use,I asked for the missing safety rails etc and was told I don't need them!
The dumb prick who told me this was on the same OH&S course as I was and 6 months ago was pinged for using unsafe scaffold on another site ( read dumb Cnut ).
I again told him it wasn't upto standard and he then asked what is wrong with it,by this time I am wondering if he has anything between his ears apart from wax.
I then said I have a problem with his mother, he asked why,I said.....she should have swallowed you,you useless waste of ******* space.
**** me, that peanut is a marvel at how shit can be stuffed into a skin and called a person.
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Do you work with Engineers..?
 
spog said:
On a job site today and was given a mobile scaffold to use,I asked for the missing safety rails etc and was told I don't need them!
The dumb prick who told me this was on the same OH&S course as I was and 6 months ago was pinged for using unsafe scaffold on another site ( read dumb Cnut ).
I again told him it wasn't upto standard and he then asked what is wrong with it,by this time I am wondering if he has anything between his ears apart from wax.
I then said I have a problem with his mother, he asked why,I said.....she should have swallowed you,you useless waste of ******* space.
**** me, that peanut is a marvel at how shit can be stuffed into a skin and called a person.
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Ahh...
I recall as a wee apprentice when my mobile scaffold consisted of a forklift, tradesman and a timber pallet.
Grab the Hilti, a box of Loxin's, a hammer and tape and you were good to go. Safety glasses could be substituted by squinting.

Hanging the pipes may also have involved a scissor lift and some balancing of pipes on the handrail as you jockeyed them into position.
Or maby two forklifts. Or a Bobcat. And some telecom rope.
 
...when your idiot neighbour backs into your company car. FFS, wipe the dew of yer rear windshield BEFORE you reverse out, not after you **** a company car.
 
Ruckus said:
...when your idiot neighbour backs into your company car. FFS, wipe the dew of yer rear windshield BEFORE you reverse out, not after you **** a company car.
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is that the company car you told the boss would "garaged" at home but really its parked on the street.
 
images.jpeg
 
GrumpyPaul said:
is that the company car you told the boss would "garaged" at home but really its parked on the street.
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Boss, insurance company, its all good..
 
That very same. Luckily it happened whilst I was driving down the street, not while it was parked.

Anywho, incident reporting done, idiot jokes made by coworkers continue.
 
Bad breath.

Just had a customer with the worst breath I've smelled in quite some time sitting across from me pointing out some details on his hand drawn shed plan.
A humid mixture of stale cigarette, black coffee, blue cheese and salami I would guess. Must have had a rotten tooth or two in there to I'd wager.
Nice enough chap, but my god, his breath was ******* gross.
 
Dave70 said:
Ahh...
I recall as a wee apprentice when my mobile scaffold consisted of a forklift, tradesman and a timber pallet.
Grab the Hilti, a box of Loxin's, a hammer and tape and you were good to go. Safety glasses could be substituted by squinting.

Hanging the pipes may also have involved a scissor lift and some balancing of pipes on the handrail as you jockeyed them into position.
Or maby two forklifts. Or a Bobcat. And some telecom rope.
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dangerous-forklift.jpg
 
Ducatiboy stu said:
Do you work with Engineers..?
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Nope,I'm a chippie so is the gifted one,on site today the peanut was claiming that he is the only person who is working as well as the only one who is doing the right thing.
Several hours later I found him hiding in a room sending txt messages and using a power lead and power tools with test tags 4 months out of date!
He then claimed it was alright because the boss said so.
Honestly, this fuckwit is so incredibly stupid he thinks others believe his bullshit claims,bloody funny watching it do a simple job,it has to get damn near every tool invented out and piled in everyone's way just to fix or replace a door lock.
Frank Spencer and Mr Bean wouldn't come near him.
 
spog said:
power lead and power tools with test tags 4 months out of date!
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Ahh test and tag. A scam, sorry, important workplace standard that's kept me in so much on site cash over the years it must have been dreamed up by a fellow sparky.
"Sure man, I can tag all your double insulated tools and battery chargers for $50. Come back in 5 minutes."
 
jlm said:
Ahh test and tag. A scam, sorry, important workplace standard that's kept me in so much on site cash over the years it must have been dreamed up by a fellow sparky.
"Sure man, I can tag all your double insulated tools and battery chargers for $50. Come back in 5 minutes."
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Scam eh? Cash eh?
As an plumber by trade I have one thing to say to you.

**** off mate, we're working that side of the street..
 
Dave70 said:
Scam eh? Cash eh?
As an plumber by trade I have one thing to say to you.

**** off mate, we're working that side of the street..
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Not going to tag your motorised shit pipe unblocker thing then.

Wish I could remember the name (eel?) you blokes call it, the above sounds very wrong.
 

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