Never fear about your first batch, it'll be the best beer you've ever tasted, simply because it's yours!
My first batch came out at 31 deg C. It tends to come with getting a fermenter for Xmas and starting in Feb.
I used my hot jug to decant tap water into the fermenter, transferring all the emboddied heat from the jug casing
into my brew, aaaaarrrrrrrgggggghhhhhhhh!
A brewing buddy of mine says that if you're learned something from the batch then it isn't wasted, so always look to
learn and improve next time.
If you want to impress your GF get a Muntons kit and add a full can of liquid malt AND 1/2 kg of brew enhancer mix.
This will be about $40 for the batch, which is not cheap and could be too much for you at the moment. Ferment it at 20 deg C
in April or May, Autumn is a good time for making beer. Be warned, making superb beer can get more expensive.
The Traditional Bitter kit has enough bitterness to carry all that malt and the result should be the best beer she's ever seen or tasted. The Muntons Yorkshire Bitter kit also makes a very good beer, smooth and caramelly.
I make it with just a single kg of stuff called Morgans Caramalt and make up to 20 litres, not 23.
If you like dark beer, the Muntons Nut Brown Ale is great as well.
Otherwise, go to the Home Brew Shop and buy any of the Morgans kits or Thomas Coopers range. They are a couple of dollars more, but worth it.
If you want stronger beer, put 3-4 litres less water in the fermenter. You can add extra malt, but the 'kits' will only balance out about 3/4 kg of malt, some a touch more but not much. If you want to add lots of malt to get stronger beer, use a kit with the word bitter in the name. Don't just add lots of dextrose, it thins the beer, adds alcohol without flavour, and turns what would have been a nice drop into something similar to the commercial offerings of the major brewing companies.
PS on bottles..
No you're not mad, I have er, eh, um, about 160 Coopers PET bottles, best part is over 100 of them are full.
It took me a couple of years to build up, just bought a box every now and then. Oh and 30 in the in-laws garage as well, for when we go over there.