What Cheezes You Off!

[SJW]

I was going to make up a funny bar sign but over the past few months a few thing have been bothering me now that I have 4 beers on tap ready to go at all times. The first thing is,
*As soon as someone finds out you brew beer they feel its their right to ask you to supply them serveral bottles of each style of beer you have for them to sample at their leasure.
* If they dont have the balls to flat out ask for freebies they ask if they can buy a few bottles from you.
* Family members and close friends think just because you brew beer and enjoy it you will enjoy making a brew for them, but when u agree and invite them to see the process and maybe lean something so they can do it themselves they decline and say they don't have the time.

Dont get me wrong, I will spend a day with anyone and go through my brewing process but when people just want you to ferment it, bottle it and deliver it I drawn the line.
Also I dont like to send a crate of beer home with someone to slam it back with their mates only to come back the next day and say "Its not the same as VB though".
And there is no way I am going to sell a few bottles to anyone, it aint for sale. Anyway I dont want anyones money, I would rather they pull up a bar stool and have a session WITH ME!
Anyway back to my sign. I was thinking of these few points, any others that should go on. Keeping in mind it would be displayed over the bar.

Persons under the age of 18 years will not be served or provided alcohol
Only persons authorised by management are to serve beer from taps
Management prohibits the sale of all beer products to the public
All alcohol is to be consumed ON SITE


Steve

 

[Screwtop]

This is my Bar, I'll do as I damn please

:lol: :lol:

 

[troydo]

"brew your own"

some will take it as a suggestion others a motto

 

[newguy]

Here's a suggestion for the sign:

The Homebrewer's Maxims:
- I brew the beer I drink
- I brew whatever suits ME
- My brews don't leave home without me

I can relate to friends/family who want to take advantage of you. I have a devious way around this, though. Keep some bottles of deliberately infected or hideously overhopped beer for people who pressure you into giving them some to take home. They won't ask again, and yes, I've done this to some mooches I know. It works wonderfully.

 

[microbe]

Here's a suggestion for the sign:

The Homebrewer's Maxims:
- I brew the beer I drink
- I brew whatever suits ME
- My brews don't leave home without me

That deserves to be engraved for every HB'er

I can relate to friends/family who want to take advantage of you. I have a devious way around this, though. Keep some bottles of deliberately infected or hideously overhopped beer for people who pressure you into giving them some to take home. They won't ask again, and yes, I've done this to some mooches I know. It works wonderfully.

I wouldn't want to get on your bad side - but at least I'd get the message - great ideas.

Cheers,

microbe

 

[SJW]

I don't want to sound like a tight ass but I am sick of giving bottles of beer to people who don't drink after all, and they say they gave the beer to their friend's brother who loves beer, and he said it was shit. So all my beer is to be consumed on site now.

 

[staggalee]

Here's a suggestion for the sign:

The Homebrewer's Maxims:
- I brew the beer I drink
- I brew whatever suits ME
- My brews don't leave home without me

I can relate to friends/family who want to take advantage of you. I have a devious way around this, though. Keep some bottles of deliberately infected or hideously overhopped beer for people who pressure you into giving them some to take home. They won't ask again, and yes, I've done this to some mooches I know. It works wonderfully.

LOL"they won`t ask again" is right.
The flip side is they`ll go around telling everybody your beer is shit :lol:
No, just a nice polite refusal may be a better choice

 

[Steve]

Come in, pull up a stump, ave a beer, say its fruity, piss orf! :lol:
Cheers
Steve

Edit: Ive given up giving my 6 (VB, Carlton Cold, James Boags drinking) brother in laws my home brew....they just dont understand that hops such as cascade ARE NOT fruity and DONT smell strange.

 

[Muggus]

Interesting that you bring this subject up Steve.
I'm always willing to give out a couple of bottles of my homebrew to workmates/friends, and more often than not they come back asking if they can buy some more off me, and usually I'm reluctant. Of course, I cracked recently with the mention of significant compensation for a case of homebrew, and I couldn't help myself. And from there the word has gotten out and i've kind of got myself into a bit of a prediciment where apparently I run some sort of brewery...on the plus side its an easy way to get rid of all of my old stock.

 

[winkle]

Like the slogan says "pig in or get porked"
If you want a bottle bring your own .
(same goes for lite beer)

 

[microbe]

Interesting that you bring this subject up Steve.
I'm always willing to give out a couple of bottles of my homebrew to workmates/friends, and more often than not they come back asking if they can buy some more off me, and usually I'm reluctant. ~SNIP~

You might want to edit that statement there Muggus. There are all sorts of people on this forum, you never know who's watching.

Cheers,

microbe

ps it's not paranoia if they are out to get me

 

[TidalPete]

Like the slogan says "pig in or get porked"
If you want a bottle bring your own.
(same goes for lite beer)

Winkle,

You have to be a little assertive in cases like this.
"If you want my beer,I want your missus or your girlfriend" is short & to the point. :lol:

You might want to edit that statement there Muggus. There are all sorts of people on this forum, you never know who's watching.

Lots of dirty old men out there Microbe. :lol:


TP :beer:

 

[microbe]

~snip~
Lots of dirty old men out there Microbe. :lol:


TP :beer:

Thanks for confirming my suspicions TP!!

:lol:

Cheers,

microbe :beer:

 

[bigholty]

I'm thinking of a pictogram sign, imagine it:
A glass of beer and an arrow pointing down at the bar, and next to that is the male/female toilet symbol and the VB logo with an arrow pointing away from the bar.

Or a send-up of a 'Danger' sign, with comical wording, ie, "Warning: Extreme malt and hop levels may affect palate", etc...

 

[pokolbinguy]

I'm thinking of a pictogram sign, imagine it:
A glass of beer and an arrow pointing down at the bar, and next to that is the male/female toilet symbol and the VB logo with an arrow pointing away from the bar.

Or a send-up of a 'Danger' sign, with comical wording, ie, "Warning: Extreme malt and hop levels may affect palate", etc...

I like it!!!

 

[braufrau]

Do you know what cheese me off? Sorry to hikacj the thread ....
when you make a lovely brew with mostly grain, a symphony of flavours and aromas and someone says
"I really must get out Dad's old coopers kit".

 

[Doc]

How about:

Beer brewed by me, and dispensed by me at my discretion

Doc

 

[bindi]

How about:

Beer brewed by me, and dispensed by me at my discretion

Doc

GOLD :lol: :lol:

 

[Gerard_M]

I wanted to put this up as a sign, but I thought it could be a bit close to the edge


I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain my beer to a man who drinks the very beer I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you brew your own beer. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think of my home-brew!


Cheers
Gerard

OK that is the last time I use that rant

 

[joecast]

Do you know what cheese me off? Sorry to hikacj the thread ....
when you make a lovely brew with mostly grain, a symphony of flavours and aromas and someone says
"I really must get out Dad's old coopers kit".

cheers to that. some people still have the opinion that all home brew is the same. how sad it would be to be them B)
joe