Help me stitch up a mate

[philmud]

When I was a teenager we'd call people & pretend to be from KFC & offer them free chicken if they cluck like a chook over the phone for two minutes. People are really enthusiastic about free chicken.

You could always make a tokenistic donation in his name to an org he'd never support. I remember The Chaser made a donation to the Libs in the name of The Man-Boy Love Association

 

[Kingy]

Dunno if its been mentioned but we use to put a car or boat or bike for sale on gumtree at a good price and the victim gets plenty of calls.
another time my mate used to run the joker draw at the pub we pranked him (ringing the pub ) pretending to be a bikie demanding that he put tickets away for us. He didnt like that one.

 

[spog]

Years ago we stitched a bloke up by ringing a lot of porn related suppliers and giving his name and address.
He was inundated with porn movie catalogues etc.
His missus wanted us all dead,she was not happy and gave him merry hell for quite awhile until the truth came out.
Bloody funny at the time,actually it still is to this day,someone always brings it up when he and his wife are around.

 

[manticle]

https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=WdtFZPxnweM

 

[Black Devil Dog]

This one worked better than my wife and I could have ever expected.

It was back when magazines had those little cut out coupons that you filled out and sent away for more information. They're not very common nowadays, but with a bit of cunning you might still be able to make it work.

What we did to get revenge on someone who thought he'd stitched me up, was to fill out every single one of those little information request coupon things, with his details and send them away.

After about 6 months of pretty dedicated revenge, he had mail arriving from all corners of the globe offering all sorts of things, including how to build a ship in a bottle, forms to fill out to become a Jehovah Witness, after all, he'd sent a request for it. How to marry an Asian bride. All sorts of sex toy literature, university courses, learn a new language, house plans, sewing patterns, colouring in competitions, you name it, he received it.

His girlfriend was getting really worried that he was lying to her and leading some sort of double life.

He never suspected it was us and when we finally told him, he still didn't believe us.

It was awesome.

We got a lot of the magazines for free from doctor waiting rooms, hairdressers, friends etc and the coupons could be sent free as well. So it didn't cost much either.

I'm not sure how you would adapt it to make it work today, but if you can make it work, you'll get sweet revenge.

 

[pcmfisher]

Wire a partially open can of sardines to his exhaust manifold. B)

 

[Mardoo]

Wire a partially open can of sardines to his heater air intake. B)

FTFY

 

[Mr. No-Tip]

No way he'll have Skype, like i said doesn't even have email.

I think its going to have to be something snail mail--- which leads back to glitter...

No you misunderstand. You can add $ credit to your Skype, and call real numbers from it.

 

[Grainer]

Brew a stout with with sheep testacles in the boil and don't tell him

 

[Camo6]

Wire a partially open can of sardines to his exhaust manifold. B)

I'm liking where this is going. You could import some pure skunk essence and tip it into his plenum chamber. I think I might have read that on this forum before.

Did you mention he's a farmer? On the subject of odours, I wonder if you could put some eau d'estrus in his gumboots and get all the neighbouring dogs humping his leg everytime he walks the paddocks?

 

[TheWiggman]

I'm guessing he's a farmer and not overly tech savvy. If you know the autocorrect function in Word, see if you can jump on his PC and add a few words to the autocorrect list -
No : hell no
Yes : **** yeah
(Wife's name) : ex's name
(His name) : ********
Would : wouldn't
Will: won't
Regards : I love every flower
Please : pretty please
It : when the going gets tough it

The last two are particularly effective because if you're typing on the keyboard one hand style you look up and see the last word you've typed, but if you're not on the ball you fail too see the word/s crammed in front.
The above prank is particularly hilarious at workplaces as I have demonstrated to my unsuspecting colleagues over the past 8 years. It's great for people who are no good with PCs though because if they can't work it out, they CAN NOT type the words without them changing. Sounds simple but bloody annoying for people who just want to write an e-mail every now and then without addressing themselves as ********.

Edit: just read post 20, oh well.

 

[Florian]

Brew him a stout with sheep testicles in the keg and show him once he finished it.

FTFY

 

[Superoo]

Loving these ideas lads,

Sheep nuts in a boil... wouldn't bother him, bushy as, he wouldn't even blink.

The Skype thing... yes now I get it, cheers - I actually have a Skype account -- somewhere...

A mail barrage of some sort is probably the best go, he only gets his mail once or twice a week, might have to start entering some things...