Wtf: Brewzer Lager Maker

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randyrob

Halfluck Brewing
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Please Explain! This is just wrong, i don't know where to start really.
leaving your beer on the yeast trub for starters!

http://www.boysstuff.co.uk/product.asp?id=10125


"Forget that watery yellow stuff your dad used to make. The beer produced by the BrewZer beat several national brands in a taste test!

The BrewZer is a mini micro-brewery with a compact and revolutionary design. Unbelievably simple to use, you can make beer at home in just ten minutes. The pack includes a set of ingredients which makes ten pints. Just mix these with cold tap water, and 21 days later, you've got perfect beer. The process is so simple because there is no sterilizing or boiling water involved. The BrewZer is a closed, pressure controlled brewing vessel. Once the ingredients and water are mixed, the pressure causes fermentation. This also helps to clarify the beer, forcing the yeast out of suspension. The build-up of pressure dispenses the first three to four pints of beer, ensuring there's no chance of spoilage.

The powder contains only natural ingredients used in traditional breweries, such as malt, hops, and yeast. The ingredients are prepared and blended, then turned into a soluble powder, which miraculously retains all its natural flavours and characteristics. The result is a beautifully balanced, strong English beer, at 4.5 percent abv.

The Lager BrewZer produces a highly refreshing Pilsner style lager, with good lager notes. As with all lagers, it's best served chilled, and at a higher carbonation level than that achieved in the BrewZer itself. (Full instructions on how to increase carbonation and properly chill the beer are supplied.) The BrewZer is completely re-usable, with 30 pint refill packs (Lager or Bitter) available. All the components that come into contact with the beer come sterilised with each refill pack. At least you can have cheap, easy to produce beer that doesn't taste like p*ss

"
 
Forget stainless steel bling, I gotta get me some of this classy plastic. :blink: Kind of looks like a rude fungus, I guess that the beers would taste similar.
 
it is wrong on so many levels!

how about the fact the dispencer looks like a hand pump so you'd have to finish it off
within a couple of days of your first pour.
 
Is it just me or does that pic of the glass in front look like someones taken a whizz in a beer glass? :blink:

Bugger that... I'm more impressed by the gentleman's ball scratcher on that site. What a find!! B)

Gentleman's Ball Scratcher

Probably more practical too.

Warren -

get another one and it looks like you could toss your own fruit salad ;)
 
Is it just me or does that pic of the glass in front look like someones taken a whizz in a beer glass? :blink:

NO SURELY NOT! the marketing team specifically says "doesn't taste like p*ss" :huh:

also i love this line "miraculously retains all its natural flavours and characteristics"

har har har :D

gotto love a lager fermented at room temperature without a diacetyl rest...
 
Is it just me or does that pic of the glass in front look like someones taken a whizz in a beer glass? :blink:
get another one and it looks like you could toss your own fruit salad ;)

:lol: Innuendo.

Warren -
 
Who writes this stuff?
...licked your lips at the sight of a willy? Here's your chance to do it at the dinner table. Not only is it a delicious creamy treat, it makes your breath fresh too.

Im sure a few other have, but myself i can say certainly not <_<
 
Your guess on the quality of the BrewZer is spot on .. it's craptacular !

I was given one a few years ago when the local Brewcraft shop had imported a few samples but decided against stocking them.

Mix the DME & whatever else is in the plastic bottle with water, add to the plastic bladder (wine cask arrangement) , add yeast, fit cap and stand back

Produced totally putrid liquid .. not sure if it was beer .. would've tasted better if I had've pissed in it :lol:
 

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