How To Make The Lightest, Thinest Beer Ever?

[SJW]

Also has anyone mashed with plain old rice? Would this add fermentable without adding flavour?
What am I saying I can't believe that I am doing this

 

[0M39A]

I was thinking I might add some DRY ENZYME just to ensure that there is no trace of any flavour.

Could someone suggest a hop variety that would be good in this type of (drink) beer?

super alpha?
POR?
Northern Brewer?

probably get the most authentic megaswill flavour with some isomerised tetrahops, lol

 

[Stuster]

Shame, SJW, shame. :angry: :lol:

Ross has used rice. Here.

For hops, I think you need a low co-humulone hop, high alpha hop to add no flavour. Magnum might be good for this terrible, terrible plan.

And don't you think the Vienna might add too much maltiness.

 

[Thirsty Boy]

I'm a little confused..

Are you trying to make a light bodied, lightly flavoured beer that your average megaswill drinker will like, but that tastes as good as you can make it.

OR

Are you actually trying to make it taste bad on purpose?

Cause if its the former - maybe just shoot for a Classic American Pilsner such as this one, or an American Wheat. You could try Kai's recipes for Corona and American wheat in the AHB recipes. They look light, seriously drinkable and clean and crisp as you could possibly ask for. In the case of either of Kai's recipes or a C.A.P. you have made yourself a beer you dont need to be ashamed of, but that should meet your needs.

If its the latter, just make up a can of Coles home brand K&K lager and dont do anything to make it better. Hell of a lot easier to do than a mash.

 

[Ross]

I'm a little confused..

Are you trying to make a light bodied, lightly flavoured beer that your average megaswill drinker will like, but that tastes as good as you can make it.

OR

Are you actually trying to make it taste bad on purpose?

Cause if its the former - maybe just shoot for a Classic American Pilsner such as this one, or an American Wheat. You could try Kai's recipes for Corona and American wheat in the AHB recipes. They look light, seriously drinkable and clean and crisp as you could possibly ask for. In the case of either of Kai's recipes or a C.A.P. you have made yourself a beer you dont need to be ashamed of, but that should meet your needs.

If its the latter, just make up a can of Coles home brand K&K lager and dont do anything to make it better.

I'm confused too :unsure: I can't work out what you are trying to achieve from the thread so far...
Will happily contribute, if we can clarify?

Cheers Ross

 

[lucas]

Them's fighting words!

Have you ever actually tasted real mild ale? It is a complex and elegant brew, and it takes more than '1kg of Pils, 1kg of Vienna, and 1kg of Dextrose' to make one.

That is one of England's great (and sadly dying) beer styles that you are dissing there.
http://www.camra.org.uk/page.aspx?o=180663

http://www.cambridge-camra.org.uk/ale/289/basics.html

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mild_ale

some very interesting reading that WG, thanks!

from wikipedia:
In the 19th century a typical brewery produced three or four Mild Ales, usually designated by a number of X's, the weakest being X, the strongest XXXX.
I wonder if thats where the QLD beer XXXX "stole" it's name? (of course, it's not actually a mild ale though)

 

[Ducatiboy stu]

Sorry Wort..

I do love Mild, and it is a great beer to make... :chug:

You could actually make a Pale mild if you wanted to..

But they should be fairly dark..

 

[SJW]

Are you trying to make a light bodied, lightly flavoured beer that your average megaswill drinker will like, but that tastes as good as you can make it.

Sorry boys, I am trying to make a good beer, but you could say I am trying to clone a VB. I just wondered how hard it would be to make a ight bodied, lightly flavoured beer that your average megaswill drinker will like, but that tastes as good as I can make it.
I just spend all my brewing time making bigger, maltier beers, cause I love the Bocks, Oktoberfest and Vienna styles I just wanted to make a very light unoffensive beer. :huh:

Steve

 

[Trent]

Steve
I would (if you are trying to imitate an aussie megaswill) probably just go for some pils malt, with about 10-15% sugar, bitter with POR and maybe add some EKG at 15 mins to give it a little flavour. Mash low, and use a nuetral yeast like 1056, ferment around 20, and CC it for a week or 2 after it has finished. I think it will still be light and inoffensive, but will be approachable by your mates that prefer VB. There ARE, however, some people that you will never convert. I have a mate that will not touch Coopers cause he says it "tastes like home brew", and will ONLY drink Tooheys Extra Dry. Proof that most would rather drink flavourless stuff that is available for purchase lies in the US beer market, where they have some of the best beer available on earth, spread out over 1400 microbreweries, and they hold about 4% of the beer market. I think Aussie micros hold about 1% of our beer market. That means for a best case scenario, 95% of people in Oz would probably rather drink ice cold flavourless beer than something that has malt and hops evident.
By all means, make this beer for your friends, and see if you cant take them in baby steps to something with a bit of flavour, but if they STILL wont drink it, go back to making your Bocks and VMO's. I think there is little point is wasting more than one or 2 brewdays on people that dont wanna be converted (after the first 2 attempts anyway). They can keep buying their VB, you can drink your bocks, and you will all be happy
All the best
Trent

 

[liberty_nz]

Try this link from nzhops:

http://nzhops.co.nz/recipes/extralightmaltlager.html

Brendon

 

[SJW]

Steve
I would (if you are trying to imitate an aussie megaswill) probably just go for some pils malt, with about 10-15% sugar, bitter with POR and maybe add some EKG at 15 mins to give it a little flavour. Mash low, and use a nuetral yeast like 1056, ferment around 20, and CC it for a week or 2 after it has finished. I think it will still be light and inoffensive, but will be approachable by your mates that prefer VB. There ARE, however, some people that you will never convert. I have a mate that will not touch Coopers cause he says it "tastes like home brew", and will ONLY drink Tooheys Extra Dry. Proof that most would rather drink flavourless stuff that is available for purchase lies in the US beer market, where they have some of the best beer available on earth, spread out over 1400 microbreweries, and they hold about 4% of the beer market. I think Aussie micros hold about 1% of our beer market. That means for a best case scenario, 95% of people in Oz would probably rather drink ice cold flavourless beer than something that has malt and hops evident.
By all means, make this beer for your friends, and see if you cant take them in baby steps to something with a bit of flavour, but if they STILL wont drink it, go back to making your Bocks and VMO's. I think there is little point is wasting more than one or 2 brewdays on people that dont wanna be converted (after the first 2 attempts anyway). They can keep buying their VB, you can drink your bocks, and you will all be happy
All the best

Thanks Trent
Thant sounds like solid advise. I might only waste one brew day on this.

Steve