Love press releases like this.
Doesn't sound like we will get any down here though.
Double ******* Ale
Beers,
Doc
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Greg Koch / Stone Brewing Co.
10/17/2003 (760) 471-4999 x102
2003 Edition of Double ******* Ale Release is Imminent
Stone Brewing Urges Public Restraint
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
San Marcos, San Diego County, CA --- Stone Brewing Co. announces the imminent release of the 2003 Double ******* Ale in both small and large bottles (22oz bottles and 3Litre bottles, respectively). Public decorum is strongly urged.
Retailers are being asked to limit sales to just a few bottles per person. "People tend to hoard the Double ******* since they know it's only released once a year," said Stone Brewing CEO Greg Koch. "If some people had their way, each year's edition would only end up in the hands of a few, and thus we have to take aggressive action to prevent such selfish behaviour."
If you decide that you must try and "cheat the system" by following a Stone delivery truck from stop to stop, the brewery urges people to drive more carefully than last year and avoid excessive use of horns and flashing lights.
"Our drivers are highly trained professionals and will not be swayed by either offers of cash or amorous advances" said Koch. "At least we sure as heck hope not. To be safe, we're urging public restraint and asking them to consider purchasing Double ******* Ale at a local retailer, rather than attempting to gain it by illicit means."
Illicit means?
"One of our drivers returned from his route last year completely frazzled due to being followed by Stone fans all day long," said Koch. Evidently, one woman tried to block the truck's path in an attempt to persuade the driver to pull over. After realizing that she was being unsuccessful, the young woman then attempted a form of non-verbal communication that nearly caused the Stone driver to swerve off the road. While he reported that he was very flattered, the attempt did not work. "Thankfully, he is loyal to his wife so his deliveries all got done on schedule. I shudder to think if it had been one of our single guys in that particular truck. Reports are that the woman was rather attractive."
Koch then mentioned that he might have a couple bottles of Double ******* Ale in his personal refrigerator that might be available for "bargaining purposes," but asked [unsuccessfully] to keep that fact off the record.
Arrogant ******* Ale has often been accurately described as an "angry" beer with its 7.2% alc.vol. and massive flavor profile. At 10% alc.vol. Double ******* Ale is a bit "more angry" to say the least. "Those looking for other more descriptive adjectives are welcome to pay a visit to their local library," said Koch. "Besides, most people aren't all that smart and a visit to the library would probably do them some good. Hell, we don't want to have to do ALL the work ALL the time... sometimes people just need to figure things out for themselves."
Nonetheless, laggards and lazybones can learn more about this perplexing subject by visiting the official Double ******* Ale portion of the Arrogant ******* Ale website at http://www.arrogantbastard.com/db2003.
Stone Brewing is located at 155 Mata Way in San Marcos, CA and recently made the 2003 edition of the Inc 500, which recognizes the 500 fastest growing companies in America. Arrogant ******* Ale is currently distributed in 18 states. For more info, go to www.stonebrew.com, www.arrogantbastard.com or call the brewery at (760) 471-4999.
Doesn't sound like we will get any down here though.
Double ******* Ale
Beers,
Doc
FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE Greg Koch / Stone Brewing Co.
10/17/2003 (760) 471-4999 x102
2003 Edition of Double ******* Ale Release is Imminent
Stone Brewing Urges Public Restraint
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
San Marcos, San Diego County, CA --- Stone Brewing Co. announces the imminent release of the 2003 Double ******* Ale in both small and large bottles (22oz bottles and 3Litre bottles, respectively). Public decorum is strongly urged.
Retailers are being asked to limit sales to just a few bottles per person. "People tend to hoard the Double ******* since they know it's only released once a year," said Stone Brewing CEO Greg Koch. "If some people had their way, each year's edition would only end up in the hands of a few, and thus we have to take aggressive action to prevent such selfish behaviour."
If you decide that you must try and "cheat the system" by following a Stone delivery truck from stop to stop, the brewery urges people to drive more carefully than last year and avoid excessive use of horns and flashing lights.
"Our drivers are highly trained professionals and will not be swayed by either offers of cash or amorous advances" said Koch. "At least we sure as heck hope not. To be safe, we're urging public restraint and asking them to consider purchasing Double ******* Ale at a local retailer, rather than attempting to gain it by illicit means."
Illicit means?
"One of our drivers returned from his route last year completely frazzled due to being followed by Stone fans all day long," said Koch. Evidently, one woman tried to block the truck's path in an attempt to persuade the driver to pull over. After realizing that she was being unsuccessful, the young woman then attempted a form of non-verbal communication that nearly caused the Stone driver to swerve off the road. While he reported that he was very flattered, the attempt did not work. "Thankfully, he is loyal to his wife so his deliveries all got done on schedule. I shudder to think if it had been one of our single guys in that particular truck. Reports are that the woman was rather attractive."
Koch then mentioned that he might have a couple bottles of Double ******* Ale in his personal refrigerator that might be available for "bargaining purposes," but asked [unsuccessfully] to keep that fact off the record.
Arrogant ******* Ale has often been accurately described as an "angry" beer with its 7.2% alc.vol. and massive flavor profile. At 10% alc.vol. Double ******* Ale is a bit "more angry" to say the least. "Those looking for other more descriptive adjectives are welcome to pay a visit to their local library," said Koch. "Besides, most people aren't all that smart and a visit to the library would probably do them some good. Hell, we don't want to have to do ALL the work ALL the time... sometimes people just need to figure things out for themselves."
Nonetheless, laggards and lazybones can learn more about this perplexing subject by visiting the official Double ******* Ale portion of the Arrogant ******* Ale website at http://www.arrogantbastard.com/db2003.
Stone Brewing is located at 155 Mata Way in San Marcos, CA and recently made the 2003 edition of the Inc 500, which recognizes the 500 fastest growing companies in America. Arrogant ******* Ale is currently distributed in 18 states. For more info, go to www.stonebrew.com, www.arrogantbastard.com or call the brewery at (760) 471-4999.
