How Crap Is Crown!

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I enjoyed several crowns at the club the other night, it might not be the hop/malt driven beer that most home brewers seem to favor but it's a clean, crisp tasting lager that's easy to drink and really displays no faults for it's intended style. In short I like it.

Andrew
 
Sure. But it's a bit like saying plain steamed rice is bland and tasteless. Sure, it is, but beauty is in the eye of the beholder, and context matters.
The issue isn't that people think Crown is consistently accidentally made entirely bland. The issue is that someone is telling people they can't express an opinion unless they can show the beer violates science somehow.
 
I like this review:

Don't get me wrong, I hate Crown Lager as much as any Aussie with a modicum of taste. Everyone knows that just because it's got a gold label and a cool-looking, unusual bottle, it's not necessarily a good beer. But I'm reviewing this even-handedly and without bias.

I wrote the above while admiring the apt head retention, ubiquitous lacing and perfectly effervescent body of the beer. Slightly too dark amber, but good appearance otherwise.

Smell: Not as bad as the non-premium offerings from Carlton, but there is nothing natural in there to speak of. Apart from a very faint maltiness (so distant it's hardly worth mentioning), there is a smell of preservative/adjunct. I don't recognise the chemical (I'm a chemistry student and have come to recognise the smell of chemicals I encounter regularly). Wait, what is this? This is meant to be a beer to enjoy, not sniffing the glass to determine whether it contains poison. The smell is better than Carlton or VB, but not what a beer should smell like.

Taste is where this beer is really let down. It looks good, it smells... inoffensive, but the taste is rough as guts. A little bit sour, a little bit adjuncty... it would taste better if it had no taste, and was just amber bubbly water with a head. It's been so long since I've bothered to drink one of these that I forgot how shite it was. Basically no different from your ordinary Australian macro, only I'm rating it more harshly because this is supposed to be premium. This doesn't stand up against Boag Premium or Squire Pilsener, other popular macros of a similar price and style. I can't think of any other Aussie macros like this, apart from the cheap Carlton and Tooheys offerings. Still, if you slam it down, drink it cold and out of the bottle at the footy, you won't notice the unpleasant ashy aftertaste. Someone spilt beer in this ashtray! No wait, it's how it normally tastes.

Mouthfeel is pretty crap too. Rough going down, though undoubtedly smoother than its non-premium cousins, the worst aspect is the sticky afterfeel... it doesn't taste like anything except nasty beer aftertaste, but it's sticky on the roof of my mouth.

Drinkability: If it's free, ice-cold, a hot sunny afternoon, and you're doing an activity to take your mind off the taste, and you've been working hard all day, this is fine to drink. Most Australians would be happier to drink this regularly than VB, merely because of its price and 'premium' allure. But it's not great. However, it does contain alcohol.

Attention All Crown Lager Drinkers - set your sights higher. It gets a LOT better than this! Non-Crownie Drinkers - Don't bother trying this, it is a complete and utter waste of time and an insult to our country that people pay $60 a case for this crap.

Serving type: bottle
 
Trouble with taking opinions on megaswill in australia is that everyone grew up with that shit. Its 'familiar'. My own tolerance for VB has gone up considerably.

I wouldn't imagine the yanks would write off their bud lights or coors out of the hand either, even if its the same level of blandness, they'd rate it higher than aussie bland piss.
 
I actually find crown does have a flavour when not drunk freezing cold and it's a flavour I don't like. Last time I had one there was a distinct and to my palate out of balance sulphur edge. Kind of like a Carlton Draught someone had dropped an egg sandwich into.

Still drink it if it was free though - context is as important with beer drinking as with anything else and if I was with friends or work colleagues and someone bought me one I'd drink it and enjoy it.

No need to compare it to whoever's IPA or souped up Belgian thingamawhatsits. As far as pale lagers go, I reckon it's not particularly respectable.
 
their bud lights or coors out of the hand either, even if its the same level of blandness
They have turned bland beer into an artform. Their megaswil makes ours look like IPAs.
 
I am considering booking a day in a Corporate Lounge at a Melbourne Storm game for me and a few mates under the guise of a birthday celebration.

They tout "Unlimited Premium Beer", and then show a picture of Crown Lager. I would expect a bit better "Premiumness" for $220 a pop.

Through a mate, I went to the Chairmans Lounge for a Storm v Bunnies Semi Final a few years ago, and they were serving Crownies. A quick word to the Waiter had a fresh one delivered before the other one was finished. Shit, those Crownies tasted good.

It's amazing how tasty "free" is.
 
They have turned bland beer into an artform. Their megaswil makes ours look like IPAs.

I had a Miller Gen-u-whine Draft in an airport a while back and I couldn't taste a damn thing. Nothing. Nada.

I was astounded that beer could be made to taste like that. It was triumph of brewing in many ways.
 
by the same logic the top half of the crownie should taste better than the bottom half, thats probably why there are accounts of pplo only gettin g through half of it.
I had a relative telling me over christmas that
Quote:

"Crown lager comes from the same fermenter as VB but it is the beer that comes from the top of the fermenter because the beer at the top is better because its further away from the yeast and thats why its called crown"

This came from the same guy that posed the question "why is coopers more expensive than the real beers when its only homebrew?"

I just shut my mouth and didnt comment because that was easier. Although I was tempted to say that I thought it was called crown because it had a better head and would hold a crown better.

Cheers
 
I have always assumed I did not like Carlton products because of POR. Maybe I was wrong. Do you think that the offensive taste in Crown and VB are because of POR. Every Carlton beer has that same taste to me.
 
If we are going to pick on a beer, all i can say is Emu Bitter OR Swan Lager....whats going on there???
 
The brewing process is similar for all Foster's beers as it is for beers produced by any brewer. However beers are differentiated by the raw ingredients, formulations, and the process variables, such as fermentation conditions and yeast type. In respect to Fosters and Crown Lager, the two products are differentiated in particular by their ingredients and fermentation conditions.

from this site

http://fostersau.custhelp.com/app/answers/...ger-the-same%3F

Don't know how true, but it is the fosters web site


***************

But in this thread
http://www.aussiehomebrewer.com/forum/inde...showtopic=45313

Thristy (who works there) claims it be the same


QldKev

I went on the brewery tour at CUB Yatala and they mentioned that the difference with Crown is that it is matured longer than Fosters. Three days extra I recall.
 
Why do these sorts of threads always remind me of this: Homer: Have a Duff, boys!
.
.
Fritz: Thank you. My English is not perfect, butI have to tell youyour beer is like *swill* to us. Do I have zat right? I'm saying zat only a swine vould drink zis beer?


Edit: And for what it's worth if I wanted a bland yet refreshing beer for a hot day I'd pay for an Emu Bitter before I drank a free Crown Lager. It's definitely no co-incidence that EB's made in WA.
 
I have always assumed I did not like Carlton products because of POR. Maybe I was wrong. Do you think that the offensive taste in Crown and VB are because of POR. Every Carlton beer has that same taste to me.


They use hop extract. POR can be used to make quite nice beers.

Crown is not an excellent example of premium beer, but it is an excellent example of the effects of marketing
 
...

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I was at a wedding that didn't have any beer on tap (I know!), but the fridge had crownies. Just about everyone was drinking them... I thought, "they're free, so why not". I was disappointed and moved onto imported Heineken immediately after that, which was a vast improvement. While Heineken isn't sensational either, at least European macrobreweries have a little more respect for their consumers.
 
. POR can be used to make quite nice beers.

Crown is not an excellent example of premium beer, but it is an excellent example of the effects of marketing

+1 ..Nothing wrong with POR,readily available,cheap, good bittering flowers.
 
+1 ..Nothing wrong with POR,readily available,cheap, good bittering flowers.

Hop Products Australia reckon you can use their POR for late additions. I can't wait to try that. :lol:
 
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