Chai Letter

[BRAD T]

Billy Connelly's Chain Letter


Hello, my name is Billy and I suffer from guilt for not forwarding 50
billion f*&king chain letters sent to me by people who actually
believe if you send them on, a poor six year old girl in Scotland with
a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it
removed before her redneck parents sell her to a travelling freak show. And,
do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you,
and everyone to whom you send "his" email, $1000?

How stupid are we?

Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll
get laid by a model I just happen to run into the next day!

What a bunch of bullshit.

Maybe the evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my house and
sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was
started by St Peter in 5AD and brought to this country by midget
pilgrim stowaways on the Endeavour.

Fu%k 'em.

If you're going to forward something, at least send me something
mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest
friends,and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a
nickel from some omniscient being" forwards about 90 times.

I don't f$%king care.

Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually
contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's our
own unpopularity.

The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to
leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.
If it's funny, send it on. Don't piss people off by making them feel
guilty about a leper in Botswana with no teeth who has been tied to
the arse of a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is
the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if you forward this email.

Now forward this to everyone you know. Otherwise, tomorrow morning
your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.
Have a nice day.
Billy Connelly

P.S: Send me 15 bucks and then f%$k off

 

[nonicman]

I've seen a follow up message to a chain email that had requested emails be forwarded as some kid in the US would be given 50 cents for each forward to go towards a heart & lung replacement. The follow up letter thanked all had sent the chain email as the kid's parents had now raised enough money to buy a child from Mexico and little whatever now had his new heart and lungs. Some people at that office cried, but chain emails no longer circulated.