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Ross

CraftBrewer
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A few ideas for this years appraisals!!

Actual Quotes Taken From Federal Employees' Performance Evaluations....

Since my last report, this employee has reached rock-bottom and has started to dig."
"I would not allow this employee to breed."
"This employee is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definite won't be."
"Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap."
"When she opens her mouth, it seems that it is only to change feet."
"He would be out of his depth in a parking lot puddle."
"This young lady has delusions of adequacy."
"He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them."
"This employee is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot."
"This employee should go far, and the sooner he starts, the better."
"Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold it all together."
"A gross ignoramus - 144 times worse than an ordinary ignoramus."
"He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier."
"I would like to go hunting with him sometime."
"He's been working with glue too much."
"He would argue with a signpost."
"He brings a lot of joy whenever he leaves the room."
"When his IQ reaches 50, he should sell."
"If you see two people talking and one looks bored, he's the other one."
"A photographic memory but with the lens cover glued on."
"A prime candidate for natural de-selection."
"Donated his brain to science before he was done using it."
"Gates are down, the lights are flashing, but the train isn't coming."
"He's got two brains, one is lost and the other is out looking for it."
"If he were any more stupid, he'd have to be watered twice a week."
"If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change."
"If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the ocean."
"It's hard to believe he beat out 1,000,000 other sperm."
"One neuron short of a synapse."
"Some drink from the fountain of knowledge; he only gargled."
"Takes him 2 hours to watch '60-minutes'
"The wheel is turning, but the hamster is dead."
 

GMK

BrewInn Barossa:~ Home to GMKenterprises ~
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Not nice Ross

Laughing way too much at this time of night...

Say - when did u get hold of my RAAF Performance Appraisals....
:ph34r: :lol:
 

warrenlw63

Just a Hoe
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:lol: Not bad Ross.

You forgot the quintessential line my father instilled upon me;

"If brains were dynamite, he wouldn't have enough to part his hair"

Warren -
 

wee stu

wee stu's brury - hand made beers, award winning l
Joined
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Oh dear - and my performance appraisal is scheduled for Monday morning :(
 

Aaron

Well-Known Member
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When I was in the RAAF I heard SGT say to one of his Airmen:

"Tony you are as good as two men on leave"

A classic
 

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