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What Mark sez. (with thanks to Charlie Papazian).

I’ve got one too. Installed in a crown urn. Best improvement that I ever made to my Frankenstein 3V system.

Photo when in the glass, and your thoughts, please!

Oh man, Pretty (Blonde) Woman PBW “Plug me in” by PBW “Song for Zula” by Phosphorescent “The Phosphorus Rap” Oh, Jesus, stop me! This is too much farkin’ fun... :fallingoffchair:

So in summary of all that has gone before. I'm sure we can all agree on these: Keep it clean and sanitary. Use something that works. Use something that is cheap. Don't use chlorine bleach on stainless. Works for me.

Glad that was useful. Yes, the pump will be running dry as Walter explains in his tutorial that is linked to above.

You report your problem began when you changed orientation. Sounds very likely to be the cause. If the pump is not fully primed (ie has a pocket of air caught in the housing) it will make an unholy noise as it cavitates. It’s possible the pump is still okay. This guide is from March pumps...

Lawnmower catcher? Luxury!

Lads, lads, lads. Get serious. I freeze my keg to -260C using liquid nitrogen. Then flush with nitrous oxide. I push the flushed gas up into my 351 XY GTHO Falcon for a standing 10.9 quarter mile. Following this simple procedure, I ensure a closed transfer using non-GMO, fully vegan line that...

I learned to brew in the 90s, out of Charlie Papazian’s books. Not much internetty ******y back then. No such thing as StarSan or PBW, at least where I was. Charlie recommended chlorine as a sanitiser. Used it for years. BUT - brewing systems in place then were largely plastic buckets and glass...

https://beerandbrewing.com/considering-the-white-stout/ Highly recommend Black Klansmen Stout. It's the extra dollop of racism in every glass that kicks it over the line. Recommended in a noose shaped glass.

I read a recipe today for "white stout". Fark me. I mean, I like Americans as much as anyone else does. But the needless reinvention, fads and fashionista spinny-spinny-spinny ******** that their market is foisting on the beer-brewing world is mind-boggling. I am waiting for NAMBI to be a thing...

I can't drink fat yak. After two glasses of that excessively dry hopped crap I burp and get a taste like I just swallowed the lawnmower catcher . Dry hopping is okay if done in moderation and allowed to age out. Like, you know, whacking a couple of plugs in a barrel while your tea clipper ship...

I reckon @chefeffect has a pretty good idea there. In all reality though it still won't be stout. Roast barley is critical to a stout. And roast barley is roasted UNMALTED barley. But I'm all in favour of being creative and walking your own path. Go nuts.

Kadmium's right. Won't be a stout. Using what you have, the closest you'll probably get is a version of stout's older brother, porter. Assuming 5 kg total grist for @23L 40% Ale 43% Vienna 17% Light chocolate Brewfather gives me 89 EBC, so plenty dark. IBUs around 37 would work. Nobody...

These look like they are compatible with racetrack style kegs. The round post sockets should be 1/2 inch if so. The quick disconnects lids and dip tubes can likely all be spruced up with parts from here: Mytton Rodd Keg Parts Archives - Easy Kegging. Most LHBS should also be able source various...

Thanks @wide eyed and legless and @Hangover68 for the inspiration.

Simple dry Irish stout: 90% really good ale malt (e.g. Floor malted Thomas Fawcett's Maris Otter) 5% Roast barley 5% Flaked barley Fuggles (or any hop that provides smooth bitterness and is from the UK) to 40 IBU A neutral ale yeast. Wyeast Irish Ale or similar. Nottingham goes well for dry...

As you are in Melbourne, try giving Crown Urns in Lilydale a call. Sometimes they have seconds (scratched, etc) for sale from the factory, around the same price I found them to be nice people and it’s a quality Aussie made product. Of course you would have to collect it in four weeks time...

New product suggestion - can you source an equivalent to brewers hardware’s quick clean ball valves? See: https://www.brewershardware.com/1-2-NPT-Quick-Clean-Take-Apart-Ball-Valve.html It’s a bloody good simple idea. I don’t clean my valves as often as I should because its a pain pulling...